energy

Fast Sex versus Slow Sex: How I Overcame Premature Ejaculation and Learned to Delay Orgasm So We Could Come Together

Posted on by Somraj

“When it comes to love I want a slow hand.” — The Pointer Sisters

I know it’s true that sometimes women really love hard fast pounding. But pushing for it too soon never worked for me. And I’ve heard the same from lots of others.

Even those go-for-it girls enjoy a little teasing that lets their excitement build. There’s a lot to recommend a long slow dance before racing to the finish.

When I was younger I didn’t understand the divine interplay of water and fire, of slow-to-awaken female lovers and what-are-we-waiting-for male ones. I couldn’t even imagine managing my hyper-sensitivity and finding my way up to a pleasure plateau where I could last as long as my female partner needed in order to orgasm.

Yes, Timing Is Everything

Sure, at 70 my sexual responses are slower than when I was a young buck. Then I would come within 2 to 5 minutes after penetration. Even though it was the worst thing for my sexual stamina, I would pump as fast as possible. I was laboring under the mistaken impression that jackhammering was how women come.

Now it does take me longer to reach the edge of the cliff, something like 10 to 15 minutes. Typically that’s not enough for my partners most of the time.

Still I find myself at the same precipice teetering on the edge of coming. Even with everything I’ve mastered, I can slip over in a headlong rush if I don’t pay attention. But fortunately I’ve learned how to extend my sexual longevity enough to enjoy fast sex at times.

Before my Tantra training, I didn’t understand much of anything about women, their bodies, minds, and souls, and their pathways to orgasm. Now I realize that the average man takes around 5 to 10 minutes to climax during intercourse while the average woman takes 20 to 40. If she’s lucky.

So after I learned when to slow down hand ow to extend, I actually gave my female partners more of a chance to explode in a blaze of glory. Once I developed the ability to pace myself past those first couple peaks of pleasure, I found myself in a less sensitive place. Then I could give her some short bouts of fast stroking. That allowed me to play in a hotter pleasure plateau and last longer.

How I Learned Sexual Stamina

How do I do that? Well, it starts with relaxation. That may sound contradictory, relaxing when you’re going at it. Sure, slowing down makes the action less arousing. But the kind of relaxation that I’m talking about, the kind of calmness that works for me, is inside.

When I’m not in the internal grip of sexual tension, I can relax even when the old in-out-in-out is fast.

I first had to drop the pressure to make her come. Orgasm is so much more complicated from a woman’s perspective. Maybe it’s the male ego that drives the false belief that if I hit her hard enough, I’ll succeed at making her come. I had to disabuse myself of that myth before I made any progress.

Then I had to learn how to follow a path that doesn’t push me over the edge too soon. When I have to continuously fight the urge to squirt, I can’t relax.

And most importantly, relaxing means relaxing the muscular sheath around my prostate gland that triggers ejaculation. That was a major learning curve for me that I documented in my first Tantric ebook, Ultimate Premature Ejaculation Mastery.

You see, it takes repeated practice to make that otherwise involuntary muscle chill.

Just Do It, Right?

Of course, this simple solution isn’t easy to master for most guys. Gosh, all that sexual electricity is pummeling you from the inside and my advice is to simply relax? Good luck without a program to retain your mind and body (like my ebook spells out).

The strategy I recommend is to learn to shift the sexual energy away from your jewels (genitals) where it’s generated mostly strongly. Managing that lifeforce that turns us on is central to the practices of Tantric Sex.

If you’re unfamiliar with Tantra, let’s just say it’s the ancient art of spiritual sexuality that originated in India thousands of years ago. Through easy exercises like breathing, yoga, and meditation, it helps you get more in touch with your mind, body, and soul. Then you can sense, amplify, and direct sexual energy.

So if you learn to relax inside and spread the excitement out of your jewels, you can extend your sexual stamina dramatically.

It Takes Two to Tango in Bed

After twenty years of practicing Tantric sexual stamina, I can honestly say that it is easy most of the time. I just tell the most aroused parts of my body to relax and they do. I imagine a channel opening up inside and it does. I intend to siphon some sexual energy out of my crotch and it flows up that channel.

This is no sacrifice when it makes me feel like I’m coming all over without squirting.

I have made this work with multiple lovers since I converted to the sexual style of pacing myself. But I can’t honestly promise that it will work with every woman. There are those who’ve wanted me to pump them frantically longer than I can stand.

So let’s leave it at this. It takes two to Tango in bed.

Fortunately, my partners have learned to sense my ups and downs and go with the flow. We’ve both discovered that slowing or shifting for a moment pays off in the long run.

Maybe my next post should be about the woman’s role in helping her man last longer.

 

P.S. Just did that next post The Woman’s Role in Helping Her Man Last Longer: Unlimited Sexual Stamina Requires Partnership, Communication, and Teamwork.

 

Love, Somraj

Sexual Energy Orbits: How to Catapult Yourselves up to the Most Sensational Pleasure Zones

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Something magical has been happening to us lately when we make love. Often we’re catapulted to a pleasure state where everything feels sensational. And just keeps feeling that way.

We started talking about it on the seventeenth floor of a hotel this last weekend. That was after a long afternoon in which every round of sex launched us up to this lofty level of passion.

Each time the day before it only took a few strokes after first penetration. Suddenly we found ourselves propelled into a higher sexual energy orbit. Our hunger for each other and our sensations abruptly became more intense and stayed that way as long as we coupled.

I’ve written a lot recently about riding up and down pleasure peaks. (Click here to read my latest post, Physical Versus Energetic Sexual Peaks: How to Use Them to Trigger Different Kinds of Orgasms.)

But this higher orbit was different. It was more like a stable plateau where the sexual electricity just kept flowing of its own accord.

I liken these orbits to the energy states of electrons spinning around an atom’s nucleus. The innermost electrons have the lowest energy and the furthest have the most. We were certainly soaring in some rarified atmosphere.

My conclusion was obvious. Pump more energy into bodies spinning in sexual delight and they ascend to a higher orbit. It’s like the game changes when we land in an elevated new playing field.

Of course the game I’m talking about is exchanging pleasure. In the higher orbit we move way past the opening gambits of foreplay that are
dedicated to getting each other fully aroused and erect. This applies to women as well as men as my previous post explained (Full-Body Erections: He and She Both Need One for Satisfying Sexual Penetration and All 12 Types of Orgasm).

What’s It Like In A Higher Orbit?

In the higher state it’s amazing how much more we feel. And how many different sensations we experience. Our bodies become more sensitive and more receptive. It feels like more cells are awake and vibrating, sending off their own streamers of sexual electricity.

Can cells actually orgasm? It sure feels like it.

After we settle into the higher orbit, we feel our sensory fields open to a wider spectrum of sensations. And the impact of those sensations is dramatically magnified. To get the idea, imagine you’re looking through a telescope at one spot on the moon and all at once your vision widens to cover the whole moon. And that’s happening to your sense of touch, smell, taste, and hearing at the same time.

It’s like going from black and white to color. Like jumping from two dimensions to three. Like flying where we were once walking.

It seems to me that our pleasure becomes more intense in a higher orbit due to the continuous streaming of sexual passion. Because the current is steady we don’t have to work at it. Any touch, lick, or stroke seems to detonate ecstasy grenades like splashes in a still lake. And without anything in the way, they keep rebounding.

Every bit of arousal is preserved and amplified. The sexual electromagnetism is flooding strongly through and between us. But since there’s little resistance, the surface of the pond remains still while the current below is gets stronger.

Oddly enough, in the higher orbit our desire is supercharged. We love what we’re feeling yet we want more, More, MORE!

How Can You Launch Yourselves To A Higher Sexual Orbit?

Maybe you’ve unexpectedly found yourselves in a higher sexual energy orbit and loved it. But don’t for a moment believe that you have no control over launching yourselves into a loftier zone.

Before our Tantra training we typically rushed towards maximum turn-on and orgasm. And usually missed. Now, after nearly twenty years of practice, we instead build, conserve, and make our sexual energy last. Sure, sometimes we slow down. But lots of the time we pump away as frantically as any wild animal.

Whatever we’re doing, we instinctively spread the excitement in our jewels (genitals) all throughout our bodies. Our aim is to pump passion into our pleasure balloons, those energy bubbles that normally stay collapsed in our groins. That is, until we expand them to fill the field that surrounds us.

That’s how we get all our cells, organs, and tissues turned-on. It’s rare for us to soar to a higher orbit before we’re sizzling, vibrating, and shaking all over.

Because we don’t always release lots of sexual energy in premature explosive orgasm, we often move there quickly without much warmup. It seems like the excitement is still percolating below the surface from our last session a day or two earlier.

Other times we have to consciously manage our pleasure peaks. As we reach for more and more turn-on, we let the peaks come and go as they will. We ride the upswells and relax into the down-swells without fighting them.

It’s normal for lovers untrained in this ancient art of spiritual energy sex to tense up when hit with sudden surges of excitement. A sudden influx of sexual electricity can shock even the strongest of us. Many feel they have to control it or regulate it or push to make something happen when they’re inundated by such intense sensations.

But we don’t resist. We relax, let go, and surrender to the power coursing through us.

The gurus say that surrendering is the key to transforming pleasure into sexual ecstasy. From our extensive research in our bed, we’ve found that letting go is the portal into higher orbits of passion.

As our pleasure balloons expand to fill our whole bodies, our peaks rise higher and stretch out. The sensations at the summits get stronger at the same time as the descents mellow. This skill of peaking causes these high points to coalesce into plateaus.

Then, at some point, there’s this boom that seems to levitate us. It feels like the flood gates open and pour huge amounts of sexual energy into our inner rivers. That’s what fuels us scaling above the peaks into the higher orbit.

How Can Sexual Techniques Help You Reach Higher Orbits?

Now I realize what I’ve written so far has mostly been energy theory. Yet, the sexual techniques we employ have a lot to do with our reaching ecstatic states. If you’re interested, you’ll want to discover what works best for you and your partner. Here are some vital fundamentals.

Stimulating a woman’s nineteen erogenous zones and a man’s nine is essential. Changing speed, depth, length, and angle of sexual strokes affects a lover’s level of arousal. All of that requires reading each other in order to respond with what produces the biggest jolt at each moment. That might include a hand, a mouth, or a sex toy depending on what each prefers in the moment.

Many sexologists frequently urge lovers to address the biggest sex organ, namely all of the skin. We agree wholeheartedly as they ascend to a higher orbit. But once there following what the body wants works better than hard and fast rules.

We find that the jewels, being so sexually responsive, are the passion generating engines. So, as we’re touching, licking, and stroking in-and-out, we’re directing the sexual electricity to fill the whole body.

You’ve probably realized that different lovers respond to different moves. My wife Jeffre, for example, finds that spreading her legs invites me all the way inside her. It’s more than my hard organ going deeper. The physical action prompts the energetic opening.

For both of us, titillating a second orgasmic trigger boosts the energy current. In our latest ebook Long Hot Tantric Love Making we call this a “hot link.” You open a passion circuit inside when the energy generated in two or more sensitive pleasure spots coalesce.

I do this by playing with her nipples or clio (clitoris) while we’re making love. She does that by caressing my balls or backdoor. We found a startling rise in our excitement this weekend when we kissed while our jewels were sliding in and out.

Creating hot links is the key to one of the 12 major types of orgasm, the blended one. This is where you climax in two places at once like the clio and G-Spot.

Is This Something You Want To Practice Like We Do?

We’re always disheartened when we hear longterm lovers who get bored or disinterested in sex. After twenty years, we experience more sensational pleasure every time we make love. Maybe the above energy practices explain why.

Our pleasure receivers are better tuned to each other. We’re better at knowing what we want, asking for it, and letting each know how it’s working. We spend a fair share of our awareness reading each other, tuning in to what produces the biggest impacts, and synchronizing our lovemaking.

I’d be lying if I let you think that our life in bed as well as out of it is a perfect dance. But with these tools we’re more in harmony more of the time. And we can easily get back in sync on the higher orbit launching pad.

It’s so much fun, who wouldn’t want to practice, practice, practice.

Hopefully these observations will help you soar in higher orbits more of the time.

Love, Somraj

Full-Body Erections: He and She Both Need One for Satisfying Sexual Penetration and All 12 Types of Orgasm (X-Rated)

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As a teenager and a younger man, any swish of a shapely butt would make me hard. Now that I’m a sexy senior citizen, my schwing reflex isn’t as reliable. But when I’m erect, that super sensitivity is still ultra wonderful.

My female lovers tell me that they experience much the same thing.

Wait, did I just say that women get erections?

Yes, I did. Now they may not be as visible from the outside as when a guy’s love tool reaches for the sky. But feminine jewels (genitals) undergo much the same arousal process as male ones.

I’m talking about the turn-on process. When any body gets excited, the spongey tissues down there fill with blood which makes them hotter, darker, and more flushed. Scientists call jewels that are swollen this way “engorged” or “tumesced.”

A penis becomes erect when its three inner cylinders whose names begin with “spongiosum” fill with blood. There’s an artistic softie on the right.

I don’t have to explain that a guy’s organ needs to be somewhat engorged to get hard enough for sexual penetration. It’s pretty difficult to cram a floppy noodle into a deep cavity, right? (Let’s not forget, however, that there are still lots of fun things to do with it.)

The Edge of Wetness

What may not be as obvious is that a woman’s yoni (vagina) needs to be sufficiently tumesced to enjoy jewel union (sexual intercourse). Check out the before and after pictures at the left for some idea of what I’m talking about.

One way to tell is how wet her yoni gets. If she’s not turned-on enough to be lubricated, dry sexual stroking won’t be pleasurable. In fact in can be downright painful. But due to age, medications, and physical condition, some women don’t lubricate regardless of how aroused they are. To deal with that, we’ve found our favorite water-based lube that we buy in cases and always keep at hand.

Johnny Carson used to do a skit regularly called “The Edge Of Wetness.” You couldn’t depend on those jokes to be wet either.

Since feminine wetness isn’t totally predictable, we all need a better indicator of the feminine erection. Sheri Winston, in her great book Women’s Anatomy of Arousal, calls this the “cuff.” That’s a snug, swollen, puffy, sensitive sleeve that surrounds yoni’s mouth when fully erect. Does the picture at the right give you an idea of a what this puffy sleeve looks like before penetration? It’s the cuff that molds around and squeezes a male erection (or a finger or toy) inserted inside.

The tissue that forms the cuff is actually a spongy network extending all throughout a woman’s groin. That includes her outer and inner lips, several deep parts of her clio (clitoris), her G-Spot, and other erectile tissues in and around her yoni.

Here’s how we described in our latest ebook, Long Hot Tantric Love Making…

The whole women’s web (WWW) is an integrated matrix of linked, excitable, erogenous zones within and around a woman’s jewels. When tumesced, these organs work together to create a “cuff” on all sides of yoni’s mouth. In its puffy erect state, the cuff is a snug, swollen, sensitive sleeve that surrounds and squeezes anything that’s inserted. Though elastic, it’s firmer and much more “grabby” than yoni’s mouth when unaroused. Until it’s plump and engorged, entry isn’t pleasurable. That’s why getting only one or two parts of the WWW excited limits a woman’s opportunity for passion, orgasm, and ecstasy.

To enjoy long passionate orgasmic sex and enjoy all twelve orgasms, it’s essential for the WWW to be fully aroused, engorged, and tumesced. In order to prevent premature penetration, make sure yoni’s cuff is fully erect first. That’s the only way to know for sure that you’re being invited inside.

Just like a male hard-on, a fully plump female cuff is essential to enjoy all twelve types of orgasms.

What About The Rest Of The Body?

 You can have lots of fun playing with male or female jewels without an erection. How else can we enjoy foreplay to get our privates ready for more vigorous action?

But the scope of this article is bigger than that, namely, the whole body.

OK, I admit that whole bodies are already filled with blood and aren’t likely to get more engorged without a major transfusion (joke). What I’m referring to here is the skin flush, goosebumps, and other manifestations of excitement.

A full-body erection is when you feel those same sensations all over.

In other words, after your jewels get erect you can spread those delicious feelings and get even more turned-on. Sexual arousal may start from some sort of sensual touch and trigger the brain to activate the arousal that feels so good. But it’s sexual energy that we’re actually feeling.

In Long Hot Tantric Love Making we define sexual energy as…

The electromagnetic lifeforce in the human body responsible for attraction, sexual desire, libido, sex drive, turn-on, and orgasm.
Lovers experience it as a flow of nervous stimulation, physical excitation, and moving sensations.

It’s the energy that causes a jewel erection. But when it collects in non-spongy tissues like your torso, legs, or head, it still feels like an erection.

So to have a full-body erection all you need to do is generate a lot of sexual energy and spread it all over. If you’re healthy, a robust sex drive is natural. When your libido is prompting you to play, getting turned-on should be easy.

All that’s left is to charge all your limbs, organs, cells, and every inch of your skin with sexual energy.

My previous blog post, The 5 S’s of Peaking: Mastering the Ups and Downs of Your Sexual Energy, explained how to expand the energy out of your jewels to fill your whole body.

Of course, an explosive orgasm usually drains this vital essence before you can stretch it out of your jewels. That’s why the art and science of full-body erections begins with delaying orgasm. The article referenced above explains how to edge and dance on the verge so you won’t come before your whole body is vibrating with sexual energy.

Why Bother?

I would think it obvious if jewel erections feel good that you’d want more of it more places. If you don’t yet belong to the cult of perpetual pleasure, you might want to consider joining. No registration fees, no rules, no mandatory meetings. Just make the passion grow and last with yourself and with a lover.

Without doing this, you’ll probably have difficulty enjoying all twelve types of orgasms. And it goes without say that without a full-body erection having full-body orgasms is pretty unlikely.

Love, Somraj

Tantric Masturbation: What Happens Outside Looks Much The Same, But What Happens Inside Is Way Different (X-Rated)

Posted on by Somraj


Sexologists like me — and lots of normal people — believe that masturbation is good. It feels good, it’s good for your body and mind, and it’s the ultimate in safe sex. And when you’re climbing the walls, it’s a great way to relax. Plus it’s always close at hand.

If you’re in a relationship, it can be very educational when you use masturbation to improve your sex life. Doing yourself is a great way to learn what you need and shows you what you need to teach your partner.

Orgasms are a use-it-or-lose-it kind of ability for those who don’t come so easily.

If you haven’t tried doing it in front of each other, you have a fun experience ahead. One study showed that 85% of people masturbate while in relationship. So I suggest that a major part of embracing a fully sex-positive attitude is accepting that masturbation is a healthy and natural part of life.

Besides, those of us who enjoy getting themselves off aren’t likely to stop anytime soon. It seems to me better if we learn to make peace with it.

I’ve Enjoyed It Many Ways

As a youngster — and by that I mean from my teenage years until 50 — I did it a lot. More than daily at first and several times a week as I aged. And a lot of ways and in lots of places. Outside in nature was my favorite. And still is on my top-five list.

Being a young male without any sex education, my aim was release. You know, to relieve the pressure of lust preying on my otherwise brilliant, objective, and superior mind. For a while at least I was more able to treat people I found attractive with some degree of appropriate respect and maturity.

Oh, and so I didn’t get blue balls.

Yeah, I’ve always had a real strong sex drive. It was like a river during spring flood carrying me with it. And because I didn’t know any other way of coping, sometimes it was like an irresistible tsunami.

Sure, I felt a little embarrassed and guilty about my habit. But I didn’t think I had a problem or was particularly perverted. I just had this urge and found a private way to deal with it.

Then I found Tantra. If you’re unfamiliar with this ancient spiritual philosophy, just think of it as a way to accept yourself — your soul, mind, body, and sexuality — fully. Basically, Tantra is a bunch of practices beginning with meditation and breathing designed to help you harness your lifeforce energy. And, of course, when you’re horny there’s lots of energy alive within you that’s jerking you around looking for an outlet.

Transmute Your Sexual Desires?

You might expect a guru (not me) to advocate that you use spiritual practices to transmute your sexual desires into higher consciousness. Yogis have done it for millennia. Well, that’s a wonderful prescription if it works for you.

But all too often putting advice like this into action results in suppressing your innate erotic energy flows. Not good! Trying to dam the powerful current of libido usually fails. And with nowhere to go, the unreleased energy does cause perversions: unwanted sexual advances, damaging abuse, and traumatic violence.

This is not what the creator had in mind when endowing us with our natural sex drives. I firmly believe if even the weirdos amongst us had healthier sex lives the world would be much safer for women and children.

Now, even at 70, I make love a lot. With more longies than quickies. With more enduring pleasure than rushing headlong to ejaculation. With my Tantric training, I’ve learned to let the sexual tidal wave carry me to higher planes of satisfaction typically without a wet orgasm.

I guess I could say that I’ve made peace with my robust erotic current. I let it infuse me with vitality, joy, and creativity. It makes my life richer and more fun than when I was trying to repress my naturally sexy state.

Self-Pleasuring With The Emphasis On “Pleasure”

These days when I have sexual urges, desires, and fantasies, I self-pleasure. OK, from the outside that looks just like masturbation. But from the inside it’s different.

Tantric self-pleasuring doesn’t rush me headlong towards getting myself off and relieving the pressure as quickly as possible. Instead, it’s about giving myself pleasure. Long-lasting, more intense pleasure than I ever got from a quick squirt.

Some call it self-love. That’s a popular concept in new-age spiritual thought. Certainly, making myself feel good by playing with my body demonstrates that I love myself. But even more, it’s about being fully alive. Regulating, condemning, and going to war against my sexual nature always made me feel worse.

Today I use the easily recharged reservoir of sexual energy to keep myself young, fit, and happy.

Tantric masturbation — or self-pleasuring as I prefer to call it — is all about the energy flowing through my body. Since it’s mostly focused on my genitals, my practice raises, expands, and spreads the life-giving sensations everywhere.

In Tantra we call this “running energy.” It’s the conscious skill of infusing every cell, tissue, and system with the excitement that’s usually confined to the sex organs. Running energy makes me shiver, shudder, and shake. It feels like every cell is coming.

If you can recapture the sensory memories of how an orgasm feels, imagine those sensations lasting for minutes at a time all over. That’s my motivation for Tantric self-pleasuring.

So instead of trying to make myself ejaculate and relieve the pressure, I turn myself on and spread the excitement as long as I can. Sometimes that’s for hours, but at my age if I’m tired or achey my self-love sessions get somewhat limited.

How I Do It

There’s no Tantric magic in my personal hand-jobs. But there is in what’s going on inside.

Usually I watch my favorite brand of porn. Interestingly enough, the preferred visual fantasy seems to be a very personal choice amongst my best friends and lovers. Yes, we share even what many would consider theses most intimate privacies.

One boyfriend prefers videos of complete sex scenes. Another specializes in pictures and movies of coming. Another only gets super titillated from erotic stories.

Go figure, huh? Different strokes for different folks. Literally!

And in a different way, erotic images serve my female lovers, too. When really aroused and wanting to climax, immersing themselves mentally in one of their favorite fantasies often does the trick. That’s probably why there’s such a groundswell of interest in kinky role-playing these days, largely the result of the popularity of the 50 Shades Of Grey books and movies.

My preference is pictures or short animated clips of penetrative sex. Yes, the sexy bodies and glorious private parts entice me. But his erect tool entering her jade garden (that’s the ancient Chinese euphemism for the pussy) is my favorite.

You might ask how we all gravitate towards our favorite images. For me, it’s simple. How does it make me feel? Sometimes one configuration of a couple’s bodies does nothing for me while another one that’s not much different floats my cork big time.

That means it shoots streamers of sexual electricity inside and fills me with that delightful erotic magnetism. So to decide what I want to look at while I’m stroking myself, all I need to do recognize is how much energy is flowing inside me.

How Real Is It?

Recently I’ve noticed that some images actually make me feel like I’m penetrating that lover on my computer screen.

In other words, the experience of watching porn while self-pleasuring simulates the sensations of actual sex. It doesn’t seem to be as intense or last as long, so I’m not advocating doing away with making love with a real-life orgasmic partner.

But when I can realistically imagine what making love with that pornstar actually feels like, I thoroughly enjoy myself. Does my this fantasy world in my head make me lust after them? Well, yes, of course. But I view it as a consensual fantasy. They wouldn’t broadcast pictures of their bodies if they didn’t expect them to be used this way.

So what is Tantric masturbation all about, then? My aim is to make myself feel the supreme bliss that is everyone’s inherent birthright.

Hopefully this explains why Tantric self-pleasuring is a vital part of my spiritual practice. If I wasn’t proud of what I’ve developed, would I be sharing this so openly with you?

May you openly make peace with your own masturbation style and find a healthy way to infuse your life with such ecstasy.

Love, Somraj

Physical Versus Energetic Sexual Peaks: How to Use Them to Trigger Different Kinds of Orgasms (X-Rated)

Posted on by Somraj

We had a great 12 hour sex party with a favorite girlfriend and a favorite boyfriend yesterday. We’re so close and trusting and intimate that the ecstasy and the laughter was life-altering.

And I learned even more about what happens with sexual energy during peaking. That’s the sudden ascent followed by the sudden descent of your turn-on. I’ve been studying pleasure peaks lately and just wrote what I thought was the definitive guide here. But we all had so many of them that I couldn’t help seeing deeper into what happens.

Even all being so turned on, we started out without many sharp, jarring peaks. I’m not just talking about first penetration. In our latest ebook Long Hot Tantric LoveMaking we devote a whole chapter to initial entry because it’s so critical to create an energetic connection before the action heats up. Yes, I’m referring to when his vajra (penis) first enters her yoni (vagina).

Sometimes the first strokes create off-the-charts sexual electricity. But yesterday we weren’t in any hurry and found the first few minutes enjoyable but not explosive. When you’re Tantrically-trained as we all are, we can devote a long time to savoring the delicious sensations without rushing.

Then the first pleasure spike hit me. Because I was so relaxed, I could see the sexual energy blossoming in vajra’s head as my excitement rose. After a few up-down cycles driven by many in-out cycles, I noticed the blossoming energy created a current. I could call it a flow of sexual electricity or use many other poetic images. But simply I could feel this hot buzzing sensation pulsing the end of my love tool. That was way real, not just some artistic reference or scientific factoid.

As our lovemaking continued, the sexual charge intensified. What I was feeling was more heat spreading down my shaft and into my G-Spot (prostate gland). When more energy infused my prostate, the tops of the peaks felt like bursts of fire in this orgasm-central gland. Undoubtedly it’s these intense G-Spot bursts that make many men come before they want to.

It occurred to me that some pleasure peaks are more physical in nature while others are more energetic. Of course, it’s sexual energy that creates all the great feelings of any kind of sex anywhere around the body. But what I’ve just described is what happens when you stimulate physical erogenous zones. In other words, hit the physical trigger and for sure you’ll generate sexual energy.

I wondered if some sexual peaks are triggered by energy first. I was sure this had happened to me a lot when I wasn’t paying much attention to these erotic physics. Sex can be way distracting, right? So I decided to play with the dense charge that the sexual strokes was creating. That was partly because the excitement in my vajra at the top of the peaks was getting too close to comfort. I needed to do something to prevent myself from ejaculating prematurely.

What I chose to do was spread the excitement up the central channel from my crotch to my heart. To do that I consciously used the 5 cruxes of ecstasy (breath, sound, movement, presence, and visualization) described in that previous blog post. (It’s entitled The 5 S’s of Peaking: Mastering the Ups and Downs of Your Sexual Energy.) At the next peak I felt a flare of sexual energy shoot up my body. After a couple more energy flares, my whole body started to tingle and vibrate like my cockhead alone did moments before.

These were peaks triggered by me intentionally moving energy, not just from sexual friction around my most sensitive pleasure spots.

By the way, spreading energy upwards like this is the secret to having full-body orgasms. Even though it wasn’t a full-blown climax this time, that’s what it felt like to my body. Have you ever found that what you were sharing felt so good that you never wanted it to stop? Sure you have. Well, that’s where I was.

After what seemed like nearly forever I noticed my sweetie making those sharp breaths and jerky movements that signals she’s close. I don’t know if this is your experience, but it’s much easier to get her close to coming than push her over the edge. So I thought I’d see if the high-voltage sexual charge in my vajra would help.

I visualized that the dense energy in vajra’s head started sending off sparks and bursts and flares into her yoni. Her reaction was instantaneous. One of the truly wonderful things about my beloved is that she wears her arousal on her sleeve. Sorry, bad idiom, as we were both naked. What I mean is that she makes how she’s feeling crystal clear. So there was no doubt in my mind that she was jolted by the streams of energy I was shooting into her yoni.

Sometimes we can hover on the edge of a Big O for many minutes. You know, approaching the brink and them inexplicably backing off. But not this time. I think all it took was two deep strokes of my vajra while it streamed sexual electricity. Suddenly she started to come. So I followed one of the 17 Orgasm Principles laid out in our new ebook. Namely, I didn’t change a thing. I maintained the same stroke speed, depth, angle, and pressure. And I kept directing energy bursts inside her.

Would you agree that my experiment was successful? I used sexual energy to trigger a resounding pleasure peak powerful enough to call it an explosive orgasm.

I’m really looking forward to more experiments soon. Once we both recover from yesterday’s marathon.

Love, Somraj

The 5 S’s of Peaking: Mastering the Ups and Downs of Your Sexual Energy

Posted on by Somraj

I still remember the homework that our Tantra instructor assigned us years ago. Pleasure yourself to a peak but back off without coming. Do it at least three times.

Back then this oversexed guy had no concept about delaying orgasm and extending lovemaking. But this three-peaks exercise completely changed my life. To be more specific, my sex life.

A sexual peak is when your excitement spikes before it drops suddenly. It’s when your turn-on suddenly shoots upward and bounces you off the bed. Sometimes it feels like you’re momentarily levitating before the eruption calms.

A peak is like a mini-orgasm that may lead to a Big O.

Obviously these are wonderful gifts we are all grateful for. Except when they make the guy come too soon. Or when a series of them drains the woman’s vital essence making it harder for her to come.

Lovers like us who specialize in orgasmic sex — having all the intense feelings as if we were coming the whole time — apply the skill of peaking every time we make love. That’s the conscious ability to manage the rising and falling of arousal.

Mastering Peaking

When you master the skill of peaking, you can float on the precipice where the pleasure is most intense. I call it dancing on the verge which you can do for minutes or more at a time. You might have heard of “edging,” that’s backing off when you get to close to coming. Both edging and dancing on the verge are two of the many peaking techniques which are vital tools of orgasmic sex.

Now you might ask what’s wrong with letting it all hang out and going for it. Well, nothing if you’re both so hot that all you crave is the explosive release of a quickie.

But all too often quickies drop you into the orgasm gap. That’s the well-documented phenomenon of him climaxing much more quickly than her. Further, it may cut your hard-to-come-by playtime short.

Once, after a weeklong business trip, we made a nest in front of the fireplace so we could enjoy hours of orgasmic sex. Unfortunately (or fortunately?), we were both so horny that we couldn’t last more than a few minutes. So we came together in an earth-shattering blaze of glory. The funniest part was our golden retriever putting his snout between our faces and howling right along with us. To be sure, an awesome moment. But we were hard pressed to get as turned-on for the next few hours.

To if you want to overcome premature ejaculation, build more excitement for bigger or easier orgasms, or make it last longer, you may want to get good at peaking.

Anatomy Of A Sexual Peak

To learn peaking, it helps to understand what’s happening with your sexual energy. Sexual energy is the electromagnetic life force in your body responsible for attraction, sexual desire, libido, sex drive, turn-on, and orgasm. Lovers normally feel it as nervous stimulation, physical excitation, and spreading sensations.

So obviously building enough sexual energy is what causes a peak of pleasure.

Every sexual stroke — be it by hand, mouth, toy, or jewel (genital) penetration — creates a flow of passion current just like the output from an electrical generator. Some strokes may trigger energy blossoms that shoot streamers throughout your body. Some feel like fireworks exploding inside. Others feel like the hot cascades of an erotic waterfall.

If all the sexual energy you generate stays in your most erogenous zones around your crotch, the sensation is way intense. Too much concentrated energy is what makes men come uncontrollably before they’re ready. And by confining the fire around the jewels, it typically doesn’t lead to full-body orgasms.

This may not sound like much of a problem for you if you’re a multi-orgasmic woman, assuming your partner can keep up with you. It’s just that putting all your attention on orgasm can distract you from enjoying the journey. You know, taking time to smell the roses.

And when smelling the roses feels like the most powerful erotic explosion you’ve ever had, you don’t want it to end too soon.

Fill Your Pleasure Balloon

For perpetual orgasmic sex, lovers need to manage the energy build-up before and the release after the peak. And instead of wasting the passion, channel it to fill the whole body.

I use the analogy of the pleasure balloon to help understand how peaking works. Your pleasure balloon is an imaginary energy bubble inside your body that limits and regulates your capacity to feel. At rest, the pleasure balloon is collapsed around your jewels. As you get excited and sexual energy fills your container, it expands spreading the yummy sensations. If you fill it rapidly, it can pop, wasting all that life-giving passion before you’re ready to break.

But if you change your focus to pumping sexual energy into your pleasure balloon, sex becomes more erotic, more intense, and longer lasting. You shift from pushing for or avoiding the Big O to enjoying the trancey feeling of lightness and the percolating sensations of pleasure all over.

It’s your pleasure balloon — the energy bubble filling your whole body — that makes you feel like you’re levitating.

When you’re enjoying orgasmic sex, you maintain the feeling that the tidal wave of sexual energy causes just before a huge climax. You float on the edge of the cliff without sliding over.

Are you getting just a little bit interested in using those electric sexual strokes to hover at sexual peaks while you fill your pleasure balloon instead of keeping your accelerator floored?

How To Peak

I’m a guy with a college-trained brain that needs formulas to remember things. So I use the 5 S’s to describe peaking. These were first described in my ebook Ultimate Premature Ejaculation Mastery which later came out in print as Male Multiple Orgasm. The 5 S’s are…

  • Stop
  • Slow
  • Switch
  • Sound
  • Spread.

If you feel like you’re about to be catapulted uncontrollably over the precipice, you don’t need a college degree to figure out you should stop moving. If it’s the friction on your jewels that is pumping that sexual electricity into your pleasure balloon, turn off the generator for a moment. Duh!

Of course, when those urges are driving you, that’s sometimes easier said than done. But managing peaks usually starts by learning to how stop moving altogether. If you’re with a partner, this may not be the most popular technique but it is fundamental step on the peaking learning curve.

When you do stop in the middle of the action, you’ll take a break in funneling sexual energy into your pleasure balloon. This should make your sensations subside. I find if I take a couple deep breaths and relax as much as possible, I can reset for another ascent pretty quickly.

Sometimes the dip in excitement isn’t instantaneous. Your arousal might keep rising for a bit as you get still. That’s why a major part of each lover’s learning curve has to do with timing. But stopping is reliable at slowing the sharp ascent. And you may find the crest rounding a bit as your excitement settles down.

Slowing And Switching

When you have success with stopping, it shouldn’t be a great leap to softening your peaks by slowing. Again, this should be pretty straightforward. If you’re stroking in and out once every 2 seconds, try one every 3, 4, or 5 seconds. It’s not that different than stopping for a count of two before your next stroke.

If stopping and slowing are elementary school techniques, when you’re ready to master switching you’ve graduated to high school. Switching simply means changing what you’re doing. Change the depth, angle, or pressure of your strokes. Shift sexual positions so the friction is less or creates different sensations.

One advanced way of switching is to adjust the pattern of your strokes. For example, if you’re making two deep pumps followed by one shallow, change to one deep and two shallow. That assumes shallower strokes are less arousing at that moment. If the reverse is true for you, well, reverse them.

As you learn switching, you’ll probably find some stroking adjustments will feel more exciting and might push you over the edge. All in the learning curve, baby. But gradually you’ll discover ways to adjust your lovemaking to ease your peaking without stopping or slowing.

Even Higher Sexual Education

The last two of the 5 S’s, sounding and spreading, are definitely the arena of higher sexual education. That’s because they deal with regulating the generation and flow of sexual energy directly. While most women tend to grasp this ability more readily than most men, it’s a major shift for most lovers.

Sounding simply means to make love sounds. Frankly, that can include any kind of noise. You know, sighs, moans, groans, shrieks, and screams. Personally, I find that I can use my voice to release a sudden surge of energy as I’m rising to a peak. Growling seems to be most effective for me.

Again, most women are better at this than macho guys trained in the stoic school of acting. Might there be a connection in the fact that these women seem more passionate than their men of few words?

The last S, spreading, is the province of sexual energy Ph.D. candidates. By the way, this last S doesn’t mean spreading your legs. Spreading is all about moving the energy out of your jewels or wherever it’s concentrated at the moment. It means consciously funneling it into your pleasure balloon so it expands to fill your whole body.

The Five Cruxes of Ecstasy


Masters of orgasmic sex develop the capacity to manage their sexual energy. In our latest ebook, Long Hot Tantric Love Making, we present the five tools for doing this: breath, sound, movement, visualization, and presence. We call them the Cruxes of Ecstasy. The first three S’s were all about movement, and we just explained how sounding functions to release too-intense energy bursts.

Another movement that’s very effective in moving sexual energy is the PC pump. PC stands for the pubococcygeal muscles that support the pelvic floor. You might have heard them called “Kegels” after the obstetrician who developed exercises for women after childbirth. When your PC muscles are strong and toned, squeezing them pumps energy up out of your jewels and into your pleasure balloon. Very effective for guys, too.

Using the breath is one of the most powerful tools descended from Eastern yogis and Tantric adepts. To slow the rise towards the peak, breathe deeper and slower in the belly. To let the energy shoot upwards, breathe faster. You may find the same thing happens when you hold your breath.

As your awareness and sensitivity of sexual energy increases, you’ll be able to make it expand, contract, and move simply by visualizing it. After twenty years of practice, I often find I can boost one of my ebbs or calm one of my hyper moments through intention alone.

If this sounds challenging, you’ll understand why I call it graduate level education. But it’s not that difficult if you have a seasoned teacher. In ancient times disciples had to apprentice to a master for years and years to receive these secrets. Back then, one-on-one worked best to provide the discipline and personalized coaching necessary to refine these skills.

But without the last cruz of ecstasy, presence, the journey to orgasmic energy mastery will be overly long and less likely of success. Presence means being present here and now. Being conscious, being aware, being mindful.

Our presence curriculum starts with relaxation, continues with improving sensitivity, and in the end becomes surrender. Not in the sense of giving up the fight but in the sense of letting things go and letting whatever is going to happen happen.

You can’t control sexual energy with an iron fist. You have to guide it subtly and let it do it’s thing. That’s one of the main reasons orgasmic sex only succeeds when you have no goal of orgasm and no rote agenda to get there.

Mastering Your Sexual Peaks

Learn to spread sexual energy and you will easily become the master of your peaks.

At first, you’ll find the ups and downs steep and the crest quite sharp with a few-second break between. I call those masculine peaks. But as you develop the skills of the five S’s, you’ll learn to rise and fall more slowly. You’ll be able to boost the summit’s height when you choose and lower it when you need to.

Eventually you’ll find your arousal won’t dip down as far. You’ll find your sharp peaks becoming more rounded and morphing into extended plateaus. These are more feminine peaks.

Maybe the most sought-after benefit of peaking is having an energy orgasm. That’s where you have all the physical sensations of orgasm without releasing much sexual energy. Or semen for guys. In an energy orgasm you might find yourself jackknifing, crying out, and vibrating all over. It feels like every cell is coming. When this happens in an extended plateau, I call it the orgasm zone or O-Zone for short.

I’ve blogged about all of this a lot. If you want to go deeper, check out these two earlier posts…

Or for the full training program to become a sexual energy aficionado, download a copy of our latest ebook, Long Hot Tantric Love Making.

If this raises any questions, please comment below and I’ll answer them right away.

Until next time.

Love, Somraj

Orgasmic Energy Sex is Safe Sex, Passionate Foreplay, and Sometimes a Phenomenal Main Event

Posted on by Somraj

I want to tell you about an orgasmic all-nighter I had some years ago with my clothes on. And her clothes on. Let me assure you that our garments in no way impeded the magnetic exchange of sexual energy.

We were teaching Tantric LoveMaking at the Lifestyles Convention, the annual international gathering of 5000 swingers in Las Vegas. In our hour-long class there was a beautiful blind Tantra masseuse who was very interested in what we were presenting. With the guidance of a friend, she came up afterwards to meet us. She peppered us with questions about how we learned, how we practiced, and how she could get more involved. Obviously she shared our values that conscious consensual Tantric Sex is a high form of sacred communion.

When we invited her to join us for our community’s all-night celebration, she instantly and enthusiastically agreed.

Each year one of our friends rented a suite in the Lifestyles hotel and hosted a party starting at midnight. He only invited a couple dozen people who were responsible, spiritual, and uninhibited. After relating our conversation, he welcomed her. When we called to confirm the invitation and offered to pick her up at her room, she was excited. But she assured us her friend — apparently platonic and not interested in our antics — would deliver her on time.

Though there is always lots of coupling and shifting around at such get-togethers, it’s not a free-for-all orgy. We always start responsibly and ritually. Sure, we’re there to have fun and maximize pleasure, but our foremost aim is to honor the divine in each one we meet. So the opening includes a bit of ceremony, presentation of safe-sex and consensual ground rules, and discussion of desires, concerns, and boundaries.

With the agreement of my other partners and lovers, I made a beeline to seek her out in the small crowd. She knew me instantly and welcomed the chance for us to get more intimate.

We talked, we kissed, and talked some more. The sensations that our interacting bioenergetic fields were creating in each of us were delightful. I knew she was feeling it to because Tantric practice is transparent, open, and conscious.

Well, sure, I wanted to rip her clothes off and jump her. But I’ve learned to sink into the glory of each new moment and savor the journey. She was excited to hear how much I wanted her and how patient I was. So we agreed to go with the flow and let whatever happened happen organically.

Actually, my body was responding so strongly to hers that it was like having physical sex. That’s one of the advantages of energy sex. You avoid the distractions of undressing, condoms, finding a comfortable place for arms and legs.

So what is “energy sex?” Well, if you remember what your body feels like when you’re getting close to orgasm, but you’re not even touching, that’s energy sex.

One way to explain it is by understanding the bioenergetic field that surrounds every human body. I call it the “biofield.” You know that there’s electricity flowing through your nerve channels. And that an electrical current creates a magnetic field. The more you use the three Tantric keys of harnessing sexual energy — breathing, moving, and sounding — the stronger those fields. Of course, the more turned-on you get, the deeper you breathe, the more you shake and undulate, and the louder your moans and screams.

All of this charges your biofield and makes it surge and pulse. It feels to me like electrical streamers spreading throughout my body. Sometimes they’re geysers shooting up from my jewels (genitals). Sometimes they’re more like cascades of goosebumps falling down.

One of the best things you can learn from Tantric practice, once you learn to charge your biofield, is to connect with someone else’s. That starts by opening your awareness to feel those streamers inside your playmate’s body. Then you can open passion circuits between the two of you and exchange sexual energy. When you have two or more such connections, you can create energy circles. Our latest ebook, Long Hot Tantric Love Making, describes how to do all of this in detail.

Now self-pleasuring is great fun and an important way to increase your sensitivity and harness your sexual energy. But the synergy of feeling your lover’s excitement, adding to it, and passing it back and forth is one of the divine’s greatest gifts to humankind.

That’s what we did for hours. Sure, there was some touching and hugging and lots of kissing. From the outside it certainly looked a lot more vanilla than making the beast with two backs. But from the inside it was intense, powerful, and downright cataclysmic.

When I noticed a hint of dawn through the windows and mentioned it, she asked what time it was. It turned out she had an early flight back to Denver. So I called her caretaker and that was that.

I suppose if you ask me now if I was disappointed, I’d probably say a bit. But right then I was vibrating so peacefully and strongly that I gracefully surrendered to whatever happened.

There’s no doubt that this was a perfect prescription for a first date. And since we didn’t exchange any fluids, perfectly safe sex. And since we didn’t arrive at any skin-on-skin sex acts, most would call it foreplay.

But I still remember those continuous orgasmic sensations flooding my body. And as she related, she experienced much the same.

Isn’t that the whole point of sex anyway? To give and receive enormous pleasure?

So I still believe it was a phenomenal main event.

Love, Somraj

Pleasure Peaks versus Energy Orgasms: Here’s What Happened Inside Me For A Half-Hour

Posted on by Somraj

When a lover expands their sexual play to include more energy sex instead of simply friction sex around the erogenous zones, it’s natural to wonder how two critical tools work together. I’m referring to peaks of pleasure and energy orgasms.

My new ebook Long Hot Tantric Love Making defines a pleasure peak as…

A sudden surge of turn-on in which your excitement rises to a high level and quickly drops back down sharply.

You know, when your passion suddenly spikes nearly overloading your system. It’s the sudden flood in energy that shocks your system even while it feels so amazing. As you learn to manage stronger flows of sexual electricity, it doesn’t have to incapacitate you. I call navigating the peaks and troughs of physical pleasure “peaking.” Peaking means riding the upward wave, sailing over the top without losing it, and relaxing into the vibrating sensations as you float back down. That’s one of the pivotal skills lovers master to make love for hours at higher and higher levels of passion.

The better you get at intentionally peaking, the higher the peaks soar and the longer they last. Eventually they stretch out so it feels like you’re coming continuously. That’s why we call this style of making love “orgasmic sex.”

Before we examine energy orgasm, let’s see what the more classic physiological symptoms are of orgasm. My ebook relates…

Modern sexologists have detailed what happens when you get sexually aroused from jewel (genital) stimulation. Your sensitive zones swell with blood, your muscles tense up, your breathing deepens and accelerates to more than three times normal, your body temperature rises, and your heart rate more than doubles. Many of these phenomena are the result of being flooded with hormones. During orgasm they say, that muscle tension is released at the peak of excitement accompanied by pulsations in your pelvis, notably your pubococcygeus and anal muscles. It’s a charging-discharging cycle.

In the 1960s Masters and Johnson found about twelve involuntary contractions within ten seconds was the norm. Your face, arms, legs, stomach, and butt contract. Your skin suddenly gets flushed as you’re suffused with warmth all over. Suddenly you’re overwhelmed with an intense flood of euphoric sensations. It feels as if time stops and you lose touch with the outside world for a moment. Then your metabolism slowly returns to normal.


With any luck, you’ve noticed your partner growling or crying out, curling their fingers and toes, arching their back, lifting their pelvis, tightening their butt, jackknifing, shaking all over, or grabbing onto you forcefully. Sometimes a man can feel a woman’s heart beating around him and he can feel her muscles spasming and contracting. Now all of this is so satisfying that the quest for orgasm often changes the course of history, at least for us personally.

But if you look deeper underneath most of these physical reactions, you’ll discover that it’s the sexual electricity and erotic magnetism that’s driving the experience. Harnessing and channeling that lifeforce is what “energy orgasm” is all about. My ebook defines it as…

An orgasm resulting from intense streaming of sexual energy throughout the body. It’s more like pulsing electromagnetic waves than physical spasms.

You’ll note that both pleasure peaks and energy orgasms aren’t defined by the explosive release of tension through jewel contractions. That’s the accepted sexological definition of orgasm. In contrast, energy sex has lots more going on for lots longer than a tension-release climax usually accompanied by playtime-ending male ejaculation. My book goes on to explain…

Instead of being localized in your jewels, an energy orgasm feels like geysers of erotic electricity are flooding you, gripping you, and milking you all over. Streaming sexual electromagnetism takes over and shakes you inside and out making you swoon and undulate. Implosive showers of ecstasy fill your body making your entire bioenergetic field pulse like your beating heart. Energy orgasms launch you up to persistent plateaus so high you feel like you’ve been flung into orbit far above the material plane.

I’m relating all this so you’ll understand my experience the last time Jeffre and I made love. We had lots of fun getting each other turned-on, alternating peaks, and then peaking together. When her energy was nearing its limit, she asked for my help to go for a Big O which was glorious.

Like the loving partner she is, after recovering she asked if she could do me. In earlier posts I’ve described how she uses my favorite vibrator on me. My point here is what happened to me inside.

First, I had a series of short, sharp peaks. Next, they started to rise and spread out. Each time I had delightful surge of sensation spreading out from my jewels that made me naturally tense as the excitement rose. Part of the skill of peaking is to relax into the tension instead of fighting it. Each time I did, a shiver spread through me culminating in what the ancient Tantrics call a “kriya,” an involuntary spontaneous twitch, jerk, or jolt of the body in response to the flow of sexual energy. 

Now you might ask “Is that an energy orgasm?” Definitively, I can say yes and no. I mean, compared to the thirty-second to one-minute ones I have, no. But it’s a startling and resounding wave of pleasure, so, yes. In other words, you can call every peak a micro-orgasm. And as they intensify and lengthen, you could deem them mini-orgasms.

So we’re back to my central question, again, “What’s an energy orgasm?” The simple answer is that it’s when many of the physical responses described above hit you all at once and last for a while. Ultimately, Tantric lovers ascend into the O-Zone, the continuous orgasm zone, where they go on and on.

Maybe appreciating what I experienced next will make it clearer. My peaks launched me into a valley of pleasure where my body vibrated in response to spreading spasms of sensation. It wasn’t a steady state of erotic high but rather a shifting kaleidoscope. Sometimes I just floated in a trancey state of ecstasy. Other times detonations like pleasure grenades caused a rising rush of chills, heat flushes, and goosebumps up my body. They were like an inner mushroom cloud settling on my scalp and making it tingle erotically.

At times the vibrator inside me triggered different surges of orgasmic sensations. They were like electrical discharges deep in my pelvis. The expanding shock waves of pleasure rippled out of my gland in all directions. As the rising surges filled my physical and energy body, I would quiver, quake, and shake all over. That’s a perfect snapshot of a full-body orgasm: the orgasmic contractions swept through me first vibrating here, then there, then everywhere.

Compared to the half-hour kaleidoscope, I’d have to say any old few-second peak of pleasure is more like a sneeze than a volcano erupting inside. But who really cares about definitions when you’re having so much fun, right?

Love, Somraj

How to Spread a Peak of Pleasure Into a Full-Body Orgasm

Posted on by Somraj

I got an irresistible offer again from my main squeeze yesterday: “If you make me come, I’ll do you for as long as you want.” Accepting was a no brainer. And she loved what she got first.

In my last post I wrote about having a Tantric Energy Orgasm just after penetration. But the hand and toy job she gave me this time produced totally different results. Isn’t that one of the supreme joys of making love – you never know exactly what to expect?

My pleasure peaks followed a third-world voting scheme: coming early and often. I’ve already written a lot about the Tantric skill of peaking  because it’s crucial to spreading erotic energy, extending love play, and fueling energy orgasms. A peak of pleasure is when your excitement shoots upward all at once. Peaking means adjusting the stimuli that give you these sudden surges of arousal so you come back down without going over the top. When graphed, peaking looks like a steep ascent and then a steep descent.

Peaking and Tantric Energy Orgasms are just two of the useful techniques illustrated and described in depth in our new ebook, Long Hot Tantric Love Making.

These quick up-and-down excitement cycles were quick and intense. But after a few I noticed that they were kind of localized. That’s what makes lovers come before they want to, namely, concentrating too much electrical sensation and orgasmic energy in their jewels (genitals).

Where I feel the electromagnetic vibrations  causing the most sensations in my body I like to describe as my “pleasure balloon.” It’s as if there’s an energy bubble inside my crotch when I first get aroused. Pumping it full of energy until it fills my entire body is what gives me full-body energy orgasms.

Though I often find myself hovering on the brink of a wet climax, that wasn’t my situation this time. No, I just wasn’t brimming over with uncontrollable turn-on. Don’t get me wrong, what she was doing to me was yummy. Just doing what she was doing to me for a while would have been satisfying all by itself.

Still I wanted more.

So I started to consciously expand my pleasure balloon using breath, sound, movement, and pelvic muscle contractions.  And as it grew after a few cycles the excitement, it naturally spread up my body.

At first it felt like streamers of sexual charge filling my central channel. We call that the “inner flute,” the energy conduit that connects the chakra centers from the base of the spine to the top of the head.

As my pleasure balloon expanded, the streamers in my inner flute felt like billiard balls of titillation shooting up from my jewels. It felt so good that I kept pumping the energy being generated in my jewels upwards.

After a few of these cycles, it happened. The streamers blossomed out of my inner flute and I started sizzling and shaking everywhere. When I feel every one of my cells coming, I know I’m having a full-body orgasm.

So I detonated one after the other until I collapsed in a hot sweet sweat. Now that’s what I call real sex.

Love, Somraj

 

The O-Zone: Enjoying Nearly An Hour of One-Minute Orgasms (X-Rated)

Posted on by Somraj

My vajra (penis) was having an awesome time stroking in and out of her yoni (vagina). So good that I was dancing on the verge of orgasm for minutes at a time.

That’s different than edging where you repeatedly approach the brink of coming but back down. When you dance on the verge you don’t back off much. You stay on the edge of the cliff continuously. And it feels great.

After a resounding shared peak of ecstasy, she relaxed for a moment and said “Would you like me to fuck you?” She was referring to using my favorite vibrating butt plug in my asshole. But her real meaning was “I want you to make me come now.”

“Sounds good to me,” I said, and then added “I’m gonna use James Harrison because I’m teetering on the edge of ejaculating and don’t want to come.” I was referring to her favorite extra large vibrating dildo. Her pet name for James comes from her favorite football player, #92 of the Pittsburgh Steelers.

The alter ego of the once definsive player of the year did his magic in no time. At least until my dog came to investigate and distracted her from making it last even longer. But it was a great “rolling thunder” kind of climax all the same.

Then, gladly, it was my turn to receive. I was still pretty hard even after washing the water-based lube off my vajra. I much prefer oil-based lube for the handjob that I love while getting fucked. Then it stays slippery much longer so I don’t have to break to reapply.

Then her little finger started to meander around my rosebud. Because she lubed it so well, it just slipped right in. And those sensitive tissues shuddered in delight.

You know, there was a time not too long ago when even a little finger in my butt would have been painful.  But, with lots of healing and regular practice, I cleaned out all my tight-assed resistance so now I can fully relax and enjoy anal play.

What a godsend!

I gotta admit her fingers inside me were instantly intoxicating. It only took a few thrusts for me to reach a pleasure peak which started me shaking and moaning. A few of those waves were all I needed to start vibrating all over.

Then (slowly) she put the Lust in. That’s the name of my favorite toy, a curved vibrating butt plug made by Lelo. When its bulgy end passes my sphincters, it sure feels big. But after it slides all the way in, it’s the greatest thing ever to hit my prostate.

 As she ramped up fucking me with my Lust, I started peaking higher and higher. It’s like I was being blown from wavetop to wave top of excitement.

That’s what launched my plateauing phase. When your excitement at the top of the peak doesn’t subside, you’re plateauing. The high level of turn-on stays high for 10, 20, 30 seconds or more.

When you relax enough, the orgasmic energy starts streaming all over throughout every part of your body. Then it’s not only your jewels (genitals) filling with blood and spasming, it’s happening everywhere. My body undulates, my pelvic muscles are contracting and releasing, and I’m bellowing at the top of my lungs. Which I couldn’t do without the incredibly deep breathing I’m pushing to the limit.

If this sounds like an orgasm, I agree. But it’s triggered by the flood of orgasmic energy rather than stimulating your body’s erogenious zones.  Well, to be honest, it’s not one or the other. A monumental physical climax releases waves of energy. And intense waves of energy trigger pelvic contractions.

So it’s like a coming continuously. Which is why we call it the Orgasm Zone, or O-Zone, for short.

These plateaus sure feel awesome like every cell is coming. But it can also be quite draining. Breath, muscles, and nerves are all working overtime on top of each plateau of ecstasy. Maybe when I was younger and fitter I could have maintained that sexual high for longer. Now it seems that 30 seconds to a minute on the plateau is all I can handle physically. Even when my libido is still boiling, sometimes my body needs a rest. So I take a few seconds coming down, relax with a few deep breaths, and start that yummy climb again.

After a few 60 to 90 second phenomenal energy orgasms with breaks in between, I settled into a one-minute orgasmic cycle that went on and on. I was so turned-on that all it took was five to ten seconds of stroking to detonate each new energy orgasm.  I’d writhe and shake and bellow for 30 seconds before letting go. Then I’d relax and slide down the backend of the plateau of pleasure for a few seconds. With the little pause before I had to have more, each cycle lasted about a minute.

I think I rode this particular wave of bliss for maybe 15 minutes. I can’t remember spending that long in the O-Zone before.

From the outside, energy orgasms are nearly indistinguishable from physical ones. Everything happens to your voice and metabolism and sensations except for the pubic spasms that cause guys to ejaculate. These crescendos feel awesome and it’s so much easier for me to recharge in a few seconds. Then I can enjoy ten or twenty of them in a row. I can’t do that without waiting hours or days after I ejaculate.

Does it make sense that I’m pretty much a dedicated dyed-in-the-wool full-0n O-Zone junkie? Once you learn how to keep your whole body at such a high crescendo of ecstasy for so long, you might be, too.

Even as I cycled up and down from peak arousal, it seemed my sex drive continued to rise. The few-second breaks allowed by libido to refuel my body’s energy tanks. Maybe that’s why I was able to keep plateauing for nearly 40 minutes non-stop. Well except for sliding up and down those delicious waves of intoxicating sensation.

I think I’m going back for more today.

Love, Somraj

P.S. If you want to learn how to maintain such phenomenal pleasure plateaus, I suggest you download our latest ebook Long Hot Tantric Love Making by clicking here.