Ses Games, Talking About Sex, What Turns You On

There is so much fantastic free advice about Orgasmic Sex on the internet. Here are a few links to articles that will help you find new ways to maximize your passion every time you do it.

38 Sensual Sex Games for Frisky Couples – Beducated Magazine

The Surprising Benefits Of Talking About Sex With Your Friends

How To Figure Out What Turns You On, According To A Sex Therapist – mindbodygreen 

Earth-Shattering Orgasm, How Cock Size Really Matters, Married Women Want to Step Out, Too

Here are links to some great articles that will help you understand and enjoy Orgasmic Sex…

5 Tips For An Earth-Shattering Orgasm You HAVEN’T Already Tried – mindbodygreen

Cock Size: Does it matter? – Temperature’s Rising

A strong libido and bored by monogamy: new study suggest married women want to step out – Dr Dick’s Sex Advice

Your Tantra Newsletter: How to Make Sex Supernatural – 2

The 3-Step Formula to Turn Ordinary Sex Into Something Magical Every Time

In last month’s article (which you can find here), we began explaining how to make sex supernatural. Here’s the second half of the story.

We ended that newsletter by introducing you to the 20 sweets spots  (erogenous zones) that men have around their jewels (genitals) and the 30 that women have around their jewels.

One of the reasons that many lovers never stumble upon these secrets is because about half of those 50 sweet spots are inside your jewels. But once you read our new book, Tantric Pathways to Supernatural Sex, you’ll know how to find and excite them all by hand, mouth, or jewel union.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Sacred Sexual Secrets” Newsletter #298 published 10/25/18

Published by Somraj Pokras & Jeffre TallTrees

ISSN 1540-8825 (c) Copyright 2018 by TantraAtTahoe.com

To get these free monthly newsletters in your email, click here to register.

Click here for comments, questions, feedback.

This free ezine (scroll to the end if you want to unsubscribe) offers practical sex tips derived from modern sex research and the ancient wisdom of Tantra and the Kama Sutra. We teach Supreme Bliss Tantra to help you deepen relationship intimacy and reach astounding heights of sexual ecstasy through long-distance learning and hands-on training.          Our Motto: Deeper Into The Heart Of Sex

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You probably figured out that jewel union means when your genitals are coupled during sexual intercourse. One of the reasons we wrote our latest spiritual sex how-to guide is to guide lovers to make jewel union supernatural. It seems that the authors of most sex books shy away from detailing the mechanics and metaphysics of sexual intercourse. But that’s not the Tantric way.

The Tantric way is to accept all of life, raise your consciousness of what’s really going on inside your body, and face it in all its beauty and everything else that comes up. When you confront the realities of jewel union, only then can you make your sex supernatural.

The Trick of Extending Your Play

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

Don’t get the idea that improving your sex life is only about techniques like fiddling with a dozen or two new sweet spots. It’s even more about your spiritual connection which shows up as sexual energy.

In the first half of this article, we explained what you would gain when you delay explosive orgasm. What seems to happen is that you ascend to a different playing field. As you build instead of waste kundalini, you’re transported from a monotonous plain to a high, lush mountain valley.

In this ecstatic valley you have the time to discover and trigger more and more sweet spots. You play with the energy back and forth. You surf up and down waves of passion. You get to enjoy multiple orgasms of all 12 special varieties that our new Tantric sex manual details.

You just can’t do that when ordinary sex lasts only seven minutes. That’s the average duration of modern lovemaking substantiated by many research studies.

The challenge of orgasmic surfing is handling those intense sudden peaks of pleasure without losing it. That’s why we teach that the skill of peaking is paramount in Supernatural Sex. The street name for this is edging which means backing way from the brink of the cliff.

When you can relax at a peak multiple times, you’re actually dancing on the verge of orgasm. That’s where the kundalini currents and their delicious sensations are strongest. Which is why supernatural lovers prefer to surf from peak to peak endlessly.

Kundalini governs how much pleasure you create and how good it feels. The way kundalini behaves closely resembles that of electricity. That’s why the subtitle of our new book is “A Groundbreaking Look at the Chemistry of Sexual Electricity.”

Only when you enter the lofty valley beyond quick release can you play with these electrical circuits. You can charge your sweet spots and hook them up with hot links. You can connect them with your partner’s erogenous zones using passion circuits and energy circles.

Do your remember from highsschool science that flowing electrons produce a magnetic field? In much the same way, moving kundalini creates forces of attraction between your bodies. That’s what we mean by the chemistry of sexual electricity.

Your Sexual Battery

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

Think about your body as a sexual battery. The more kundalini you generate, the more erotic charge you pump into your battery. If it’s hard to visualize a battery inside your crotch, think of your sexual battery as a “pleasure balloon.”

Your pleasure balloon is a bubble of kundalini that’s normally dormant at the base of your spine. When you get turned on, your sexual energy fills this bubble and the balloon expands. Fill your pleasure balloon all the way and you can immerse yourself in a series of full-body orgasms.

When your tank is full, you can trigger two or more sweet spots at once for blended orgasms. Men can climax repeatedly without ejaculation so they can keep on keeping on. And women can release female ejaculation to supercharge their already mind-boggling orgasms.

More importantly, when both of your pleasure balloons are full of pulsing erotic charge, you can energize your jewel union into an amazing ecstatic experience. The true magic of Supernatural Sex occurs through exchanging kundalini at all seven of your chakras.

If that’s a new term to you, the chakras are the seven energy centers from the base of the spine to the top of the head. They collect, store, and distribute different frequencies of kundalini that regulate your body, mind, heart, and spirit.

Of course, if you come too quickly your balloon pops and spills all that erotic juice before you can take full advantage of it.

There’s no reason why your pleasure balloon can’t expand beyond the borders of your physical body. Filling your bubble with that much kundalini takes time which is why Supernatural Sex lasts longer than ordinary sex. When you do, your pleasure balloon can merge with that of your beloved.

That’s where you begin to experience some of the most mystical dimensions of Supernatural Sex. Merging your bio-energetic forcefields catapults you into orbit together with your hearts fully open. You leave the ordinary world behind and soar in an altered space together. You’re bathed in pure unconditional love and feel one with the universe.

Now doesn’t that all sound worth a little sexual practice?

Print publishing being what it is, we’re afraid that you’ll have to wait until next summer for your copy of Tantric Pathways to Supernatural Sex. But there’s no reason why you can’t start practicing Supernatural Sex right now with the above tips. Stay tuned with this monthly newsletter and more frequent blog here http://tantraattahoe.com/blog/ for more advice and techniques before publication.

We’d love to hear of how it’s working for you and answer your questions, too.

Love, Somraj and Jeffre

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Orgasmic Sex Blog

Do you have questions about sex? Want to try what other lovers are doing? Join the dialogue in our explicit blog for open sharing of sexual issues and erotic encounters here… 

    Welcome/Register     http://tantraattahoe.com/blog/welcome/

    Read/Comment                 http://tantraattahoe.com/blog/

    Post/Log-In                        http://tantraattahoe.com/blog/wp-login.php

This is the adult educational journal of TantraAtTahoe.com where anyone can post what’s up in their sex life. And what’s down. Here we post our experiences and encourage you to do the same. Did you have a great time list night? A lousy time? A troubling time? Tell us in graphic detail. We want to know and help. This isn’t porno, it’s sex education. Freely post your questions and we’ll do our best to answer them. And at the same time we can all learn to be more open about this vital part of everyone’s life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

SUMMARY STUFF

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Contact Us…

Somraj Pokras & Jeffre TallTrees

11260 Donner Pass Road C1#139, Truckee, CA 96161

Email: http://www.tantraattahoe.com/connect/news.htm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ebooks, Sex Toys, Adult Products, Tantra Services

       http://www.tantraattahoe.com/ebooks.htm

       http://www.tantraattahoe.com/product.htm

       http://www.tantraattahoe.com/services.htm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FREE Tantric Erotic Art Gallery

Dream juicy, colorful, steamy thoughts as you peruse our Tantric Erotic Gallery. It’s full of free sexy pictures and hot sex pics here

         https://www.icloud.com/sharedalbum/#B0M532ODWDw15R .

We hope some of these images turn you on and get sexual energy flooding your body. And we hope when you get turned on you’ll have somebody dear with whom you can share those life-giving forces. Enjoy!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Past Articles…

To help you revolutionize your sex, love, and intimacy, check out previous articles in our newsletter archives at…  http://www.tantraattahoe.com/resource/news.htm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Special Report

As a newsletter subscriber, you’re entitled to a free copy of our groundbreaking 70-page Special Report “The Top Ten Tantric Secrets Of Sex, Love, & Intimacy.” To begin receiving your secrets in installments, register here… http://www.tantraattahoe.com/specialreport/register.htm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thanks For Passing It On…

Please, forward this newsletter to all anyone who might be interested! Quote anything

with the following attribution: “Reprinted from Sacred Sexual Secrets Newsletter ©2016 TantraAtTahoe.com.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

SUPREME BLISS TANTRA

Supreme Bliss is the zenith of sexual ecstasy which transforms orgasmic energy into expanded consciousness.

Supreme Bliss Tantra is the modern system of personal transformation based on the ancient Eastern spiritual path which uses sexual energy practices to…

     – deepen love and intimacy,

     – extend lovemaking, and

     – create continuous full-body mind-altering Tantric Orgasms.

By opening your senses of the present moment, embracing all of life and all of your being, and focusing on pleasure as a divine gift, Supreme Bliss Tantra…

       heals your mind, body, and spirit,

     – connects you passionately with your deeper self and your beloved, and

       immerses you deeply into the untold joys of sacred sexuality to

reach cosmic peaks of pleasure to make life an ecstatic journey in total communion with all that is.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Privacy Statement…

We respect the privacy of our readers. We NEVER provide our subscriber list to ANYONE. The information contained in this document represents the current view of Tantra At Tahoe on the issues discussed as of the date of publication. We provide this free advice in the hopes that your conscious use will improve your sexual life. If you have a medical or psychological condition, please contact your health professional before acting on this advice. Our guidance is not intended as medical or psychological treatment, psychotherapy, or services best performed by a health professional. Information provided in this document is provided “AS IS” without warranty of any kind, either expressed or implied. You assume the entire risk as to the accuracy and the use of suggestions in this document. Without our personal services, your results may vary.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Subscribe Or Unsubscribe…

To subscribe to the “Sacred Sexual Secrets” newsletter, click here… http://www.tantraattahoe.com/reg/news.htm

Women’s Orgasms, Health Benefits of Sex, How Good Are You In Bed

If you’re interested in enjoying hours of Orgasmic Sex, check out the great articles at the following links…

Can a man tell if a woman orgasms? | Go Ask Alice!

The Health Benefits Of Sex – mindbodygreen

The following is a great article about knowing what you like and communicating your preferences  essential for Supernatural Sex

Good In Bed – Temperature’s Rising 

Your Tantra Newsletter: How to Make Sex Supernatural

The 3-Step Formula to Turn Ordinary Sex Into Something Magical Every Time

Did you ever have one of those rare erotic encounters that electrified your body, blew your mind, and launched you into the stratosphere with the incomparable feeling that there was no separation between you and your lover?

Here we want to share with you the three-step formula to transform run-0f-the-mill lovemaking into Supernatural Sex like this. Every time you choose. While we’re at it, we’ll reveal many of the details in our new book, Tantric Pathways to Supernatural Sex. We’re excited to announce that we just submitted the final revision to our publisher, Llewellyn Worldwide.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Sacred Sexual Secrets” Newsletter #297 published 9/27/18

Published by Somraj Pokras & Jeffre TallTrees

ISSN 1540-8825 (c) Copyright 2018 by TantraAtTahoe.com

To get these free monthly newsletters in your email, click here to register.

Click here for comments, questions, feedback.

This free ezine (scroll to the end if you want to unsubscribe) offers practical sex tips derived from modern sex research and the ancient wisdom of Tantra and the Kama Sutra. We teach Supreme Bliss Tantra to help you deepen relationship intimacy and reach astounding heights of sexual ecstasy through long-distance learning and hands-on training.          Our Motto: Deeper Into The Heart Of Sex

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There are many names for Supernatural Sex. Tantric Sex is the generic term, though lately we’ve been promoting it as Orgasmic Sex. What do these names mean?

Supernatural Sex is a kind of sexual union that’s way beyond ordinary sex. For sure, any kind of consensual play that makes you feel pleasure is a wonderful thing. But typically ordinary sex is a biological process ruled by lust and regulated by hormones. You might say it’s more an animal reflex than a willful sharing of spiritual love.

Ripping off clothes, quick release, and fast orgasm are the goals of ordinary sex.

Don’t misunderstand. We vote for hot quickies anytime you can get them. Especially if they result in orgasmic sensations. It’s just that all too often ordinary sex perpetuates the orgasm gap. You know, where he comes too fast and she’s left wanting.

Supernatural Sex doesn’t just focus on getting off now, but instead creates a continuously orgasmic state of shared passion. It works equally well for hetero sex, same sex, and solo sex. And it usually lasts longer and takes you higher. That’s why you might call it a pathway to divine communion. Being one with your beloved and the entire universe.

Though it’s extraordinary and may seem mystical at first, it’s not really magic. Sure, it takes a little practice. But don’t you think an hour-long orgasmic state is something you’d be willing to invest some time and effort in?

Supernatural Sex is a Tantric approach that expands your sensuality and the intimacy between you. It does this by activating multiple heart, mind, and soul connections while you’re giving and receiving pleasure.

Which is why you have to practice together. Supernatural Sex is a partnered style of lovemaking.

3-Step Formula
– – – – – – – – – – – –

If you want to pursue Supernatural Sex, you only need to master three steps…

  1. Identify the spot just before your climax explodes where your sensations are so overpowering.
  2. Do whatever you can to get as close to that crescendo at the edge of the cliff.
  3. Stay there as long as you want while your pleasure soars higher and higher.

Admittedly, this is a simplification of the hundreds of pages and dozens of exercises in our new book. Another way to describe this formula is by saying instead of rushing to big O, bypass the urge for early gratification. Put all your attention on enjoying the ride. Alternately pace your excitement to rise in a measured way.

Easier said than done, right?

You might have noticed that you can do these three steps solo. We’re strong proponents of self-pleasuring and not just because it feels so good. Masturbation that aims for extended pleasure is a great way to learn these three little skills. And prepare you to coach your playmate to give you everything you want.

As we mentioned, to reach the stellar heights possible with Supernatural Sex, you need to do it together. Undoubtedly, helping another person float at the verge of coming is a bigger challenge.

Do you know all of your playmates’ pleasure buttons and the best ways to push them? Do you continuously communicate what you want and how you’re doing? Do you let your passion show non-verbally? Can you always read each other’s body language?

In short, can you seamlessly exchange roles of giving and receiving so you both synchronize your climb to a shared plateau of ecstasy?

Turn Theory Into Practice
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

That’s the theory. Well, more than a theory for those of us who’ve been practicing Supernatural Sex for over 20 years now. But it’s still a bit too general to turn into actual practice. So let’s look into what you can do to make the magic happen.

First, you have to learn to manage the energy crisis. That is, the sexual energy crisis. What exactly is sexual energy?

When you’re getting sexually turned-on, you can feel a small trickle of nervous stimulation and physical excitation, alive, bubbling, moving, and vibrating inside you. This is sexual energy, which you probably feel most strongly right before and right after orgasm.

We often use the ancient Tantric term, kundalini, in place of sexual energy. It’s the electromagnetic lifeforce in the human body responsible for attraction, sexual desire, libido, sex drive, turn-on, pleasure, and orgasm. Kundalini erotically charges your pleasure centers and makes you explode in a blaze of glory.

The bad news about quick explosive orgasm is that it squanders your kundalini.

To play in the rarefied atmosphere of Supernatural Sex, you need to become more sensitive to kundalini. You need to know where it’s hiding and how to entice it to expand and rise. You need to learn to channel it to and from all of your erogenous zones. Our new book calls them sweet spots and explains how to find and stimulate them all with helpful illustrations.

Did you know the men have 20 sweet spots and women have 30? Using them all to trigger soaring waves of passion is fundamental to Supernatural Sex.

  •  * * * 

That’s all for now. We’ll go deeper into sweet spots and kundalini in the second installment of How to Make Sex Supernatural next month. If you can’t wait, get free tips and sexual guidance more often on our blog here… http://tantraattahoe.com/blog/

Love, Somraj and Jeffre

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Orgasmic Sex Blog

Do you have questions about sex? Want to try what other lovers are doing? Join the dialogue in our explicit blog for open sharing of sexual issues and erotic encounters here… 

    Welcome/Register     http://tantraattahoe.com/blog/welcome/

    Read/Comment                 http://tantraattahoe.com/blog/

    Post/Log-In                        http://tantraattahoe.com/blog/wp-login.php

This is the adult educational journal of TantraAtTahoe.com where anyone can post what’s up in their sex life. And what’s down. Here we post our experiences and encourage you to do the same. Did you have a great time list night? A lousy time? A troubling time? Tell us in graphic detail. We want to know and help. This isn’t porno, it’s sex education. Freely post your questions and we’ll do our best to answer them. And at the same time we can all learn to be more open about this vital part of everyone’s life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

SUMMARY STUFF

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Contact Us…

Somraj Pokras & Jeffre TallTrees

11260 Donner Pass Road C1#139, Truckee, CA 96161

Email: http://www.tantraattahoe.com/connect/news.htm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ebooks, Sex Toys, Adult Products, Tantra Services

       http://www.tantraattahoe.com/ebooks.htm

       http://www.tantraattahoe.com/product.htm

       http://www.tantraattahoe.com/services.htm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FREE Tantric Erotic Art Gallery

Dream juicy, colorful, steamy thoughts as you peruse our Tantric Erotic Gallery. It’s full of free sexy pictures and hot sex pics here

         https://www.icloud.com/sharedalbum/#B0M532ODWDw15R .

We hope some of these images turn you on and get sexual energy flooding your body. And we hope when you get turned on you’ll have somebody dear with whom you can share those life-giving forces. Enjoy!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Past Articles…

To help you revolutionize your sex, love, and intimacy, check out previous articles in our newsletter archives at…  http://www.tantraattahoe.com/resource/news.htm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Special Report

As a newsletter subscriber, you’re entitled to a free copy of our groundbreaking 70-page Special Report “The Top Ten Tantric Secrets Of Sex, Love, & Intimacy.” To begin receiving your secrets in installments, register here… http://www.tantraattahoe.com/specialreport/register.htm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thanks For Passing It On…

Please, forward this newsletter to all anyone who might be interested! Quote anything

with the following attribution: “Reprinted from Sacred Sexual Secrets Newsletter ©2016 TantraAtTahoe.com.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

SUPREME BLISS TANTRA

Supreme Bliss is the zenith of sexual ecstasy which transforms orgasmic energy into expanded consciousness.

Supreme Bliss Tantra is the modern system of personal transformation based on the ancient Eastern spiritual path which uses sexual energy practices to…

     – deepen love and intimacy,

     – extend lovemaking, and

     – create continuous full-body mind-altering Tantric Orgasms.

By opening your senses of the present moment, embracing all of life and all of your being, and focusing on pleasure as a divine gift, Supreme Bliss Tantra…

       heals your mind, body, and spirit,

     – connects you passionately with your deeper self and your beloved, and

       immerses you deeply into the untold joys of sacred sexuality to

reach cosmic peaks of pleasure to make life an ecstatic journey in total communion with all that is.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Privacy Statement…

We respect the privacy of our readers. We NEVER provide our subscriber list to ANYONE. The information contained in this document represents the current view of Tantra At Tahoe on the issues discussed as of the date of publication. We provide this free advice in the hopes that your conscious use will improve your sexual life. If you have a medical or psychological condition, please contact your health professional before acting on this advice. Our guidance is not intended as medical or psychological treatment, psychotherapy, or services best performed by a health professional. Information provided in this document is provided “AS IS” without warranty of any kind, either expressed or implied. You assume the entire risk as to the accuracy and the use of suggestions in this document. Without our personal services, your results may vary.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Subscribe Or Unsubscribe…

To subscribe to the “Sacred Sexual Secrets” newsletter, click here… http://www.tantraattahoe.com/reg/news.htm

Sexual Inventory: A Great Tool for Taking Charge of your Own Pleasure

Enthusiastic consent to sexual play is essential for empowered pleasure that prevents abuse. Here is a great tool developed for teens but seems totally applicable for all kinds of lovers. It’s a list of all sorts of intimate activities, a long one to be sure, that you can study or check off yourself. Even better, go over it with your partner to let each other know what you need and want in bed.

Yes, No, Maybe So: A Sexual Inventory Stocklist | Scarleteen

Slow Sex, Clitoral vs. G-Spot Orgasms, Sexual Fantasies

Here are some links to great articles that will help you learn and practice Orgasmic Sex…

When it Comes to Sex, Slow is the New Fast

Clitoral vs. G-Spot Orgasms | Slutty Girl Problems

Why Sexual Fantasies Are Good For Your Relationship – mindbodygreen

Help Your Man Last Longer in Bed: 9 Tips to Make Sex Orgasmic for Both of You

Many surveys show that sex averages 5 to 10 minutes max. If you’re a woman, that usually isn’t enough to bring you to orgasm. Women need at least 20 minutes but usually 40 or more. If you’re a man, coming in a few minutes can be fun. But wouldn’t you want to maintain the level of pleasure that you feel just before you orgasm for an hour or more?

After years in the 5 to 10 minute zone, Tantra taught me how to last as long as we both want. But I’m a highly-sensitive man and it takes two to Tantra for a long time. My first Tantric Sex book, Ultimate Premature Ejaculation Mastery, laid out the complete program of solo exercises for men.

But neither of you can make it happen by yourself. You have to learn how to share the power so you both get what you need. And since pleasure is a moving target, you’ve got to stay in the now and and learn to roll with the punches gracefully.

That starts by dropping the myth that the man is always in charge of making his lover orgasm. It takes teamwork and partnership. You both have to be more conscious of what you and your lover are feeling in each moment. You both have to be more expressive with words and body language. And that’s not much good unless you both pay attention to what’s happening with your partner as well as yourself.

For example, when I’m getting real close to coming, my wife knows it. She slows down when I need to. When she’s climbing, I find a way to lessen my excitement so I can help her over the top without losing it myself.

OK, that’s the theory. But if you haven’t studied Tantric Sex yet, what should you do if you want to put this strategy into action? Here are nine practical tips.

1. Take Turns

Take turns leading and following. Don’t expect him to be totally in charge of your pleasure all the time. When you need something more, guide him so he can lead. But when he’s approaching the point of no return, let him do what he needs to back off. Learn when to put your demands first and when to put his sensitivity first.

2. Communicate Verbally

Partnering for orgasmic sex doesn’t work best like a silent auction. Even your first time together, there’s a graceful way to ask for what you prefer. In fact, before we take our clothes off, I like to ask about my partner’s likes and dislikes. Where’s your G-spot? What does it and your clio (clitoris) prefer? What can I do to help you reach orgasm if that’s what you want? The woman can ask similar questions to help build a working partnership.

Does that spoil the mood? Well, maybe, the kind of rip-your-clothes-off can’t-wait-another-second unrealistic movie couplings. But we find that talking about what we’re going to do to each other and that we really want it is a huge turn-on.

Communication is even more important once you start making love. How are you feeling? What do you want more of and less of right now? What are you loving about your partner’s body and what it’s doing to you? Many say this kind of intimacy is even more erotic than non-stop humping.

3. Ask Him to Reveal How Close He Is

The most important fact to share frequently is how close you each are to coming. Sexologists recommend using a 10-point scale where 0 equals feeling nothing and 10 equals climaxing. Or maybe it’s enough for him to say “I’m close” when he needs to slow down. Sharing like this requires that he pays attention to his excitement level. And it brings the secret (how likely is it that he’ll come in a few seconds) out into the open so you can share the responsibility.

4. Welcome Him Showing How Close He Is

It’s true that announcing a number every few seconds may not help your erotic mood. Verbal communication is important, but it does require thinking when you’re trying to concentrate on feeling. So it’s even better to encourage your guy to SHOW his turn-on with non-verbal communication. He doesn’t want to inhibit his body doing its thing. Respond passionately when he breathes heavily, moves sensuously, wails and flails. Applaud when he makes love sounds. Celebrate it every time he lets his freak flag fly. Then they’ll be less need for play-by-play announcements and fewer unexpected surprises.

5. Monitor His Body Language

It won’t help much if he’s opening up but you’re not paying attention. Monitor his body language. The more you make love with someone, the better you’ll get at reading his signals. My wife can tell when I pull out or stop moving. Pretty obvious. But she can also tell when I tense up or just get less relaxed. Maybe it’s part telepathy. But I think she’s just staying awake and noticing my changes.

Watching him does require that you devote some of your RAM, your mental computer’s memory, away from your own pleasure. It’s a fundamental Tantric principle that “energy flows where attention goes.” So monitoring him the whole time may take you out of your own experience. That’s why alternately leading and following, focusing on him at times and yourself at times, is so helpful.

Some say that the three keys to a successful bar, store, or restaurant is location, location, location. Maybe so. But I do know that the three keys to coming together is timing, timing, timing.

6. Let Him Choose Positions

Some sexologists believe that it’s better for the guy if the woman is on top. Supposedly he can relax and not work as hard. That never seems to work for me. Sure, I love it when she’s riding me if I’m not too close. But when I’m hypersensitive, I’m much better able to regulate my excitement in different sexual positions where I have more control. Me on top or both of us on our sides work better for me. The also allow for a looser fit as well as other postures when she can spread her legs. I save the tighter fit positions for times I’m able to pump to her heart’s delight.

7. Let Him Choose the Pace

When he needs to manage his excitement, let him choose the pace. When he slows down to keep from going over the edge, follow him. When he’s less sensitive and goes faster, lose yourself and enjoy it.

8. Experiment With Strokes 

The better you understand the ten sweet spots (erogenous zones) on your man’s vajra (penis), the easier it will be to find sexual strokes that he’s less sensitive to. Sex books commonly say that the head and crown are the most excitable.

For the first 30 minutes or so that’s usually true for me. But after I’ve peaked multiple times without coming, lower on my shaft becomes “sweeter.” Before we understood this, the spasms of my wife’s yoni (vagina) usually made me climax. Now I switch to shallower strokes when I know she’s on the verge. This allows me to maintain the angle and speed of my thrusts while reducing my excitement.

Agree that you will play with speed, angle, depth, length, and pressure of sexual strokes to find thrusting patterns that keep him going while you’re climbing.

9. Sync Your Sexual Energy

How much sexual energy you generate determines how turned-on you each get. When you’re both climbing to a peak together, you can go for it. If he’s fully pumped up and you’re not, you need to learn to enjoy slow and subtle coupling. If he’s not as excited as you, you can become fully absorbed in your own pleasure.

But the flow of sexual electricity typically isn’t steady for long. It comes and goes in peaks and troughs. So a vital part of part of your orgasmic sex partnership is to synchronize the ebbs and flows of your passion. Adjusting your pace — speeding up or slowing down — is the most obvious way to respond to each other’s energy currents.

But since excitement is a moving target, how to stay in sync with each other’s energy is bound to change and morph. For example, after a few peaks I get less sensitive. So we tend towards looser postures and a slower pace at first. I don’t stick with the same thrusting pattern for long. My wife has learned to love drawing out the build-up with lots of tantalizing variety instead of pushing to come right away. Then when my genital boil simmers down, I can speed up, thrust deeper, and give her spells of the more vigorous pumping she’s craving.

***

So there are the nine ways you can help your man last longer in bed. As you can see, extended coupling isn’t some silver bullet that one of you needs to learn how to shoot. Or not, as the case may be.

Is orgasmic sex natural? Well, the primal urge that makes beasts want to procreate might be. But the pursuit of maximum pleasure by conscious lovers isn’t. It’s a partnership that requires teamwork. It takes letting go of your fears and showing up fully. And it takes lots of experimenting, give and take, and practice.

I know this lovemaking style doesn’t match the fake-news porn-driven myth of animal lust that makes you both come in a couple minutes in a blaze of glory. When that rare fantasy comes true, enjoy it. But when it doesn’t, now you have nine things you can try so you’ll both get more of what you want.

Learning to make sex continuously orgasmic for long periods of time doesn’t come instantly. So expect that they’ll be fits and starts, ravings and stumblings, before you get it. It took us years to be able to do these nine things effortlessly. But isn’t lovemaking something that you’ll enjoy practicing no matter how well you do? It has been for us and continues to be after 21 years. And there’s no end to the orgasms in sight.

 

 

 

Love, Somraj

Reimagine Sexual Consent, Be More Sex-Positive, the Male Orgasm

Here are l9nks to some articles that will make your sex more orgasmic…

It’s time to reimagine consent in our romantic lives – Dr Dick’s Sex Advice

10 Ways to Be More Sex Positive | The Everygirl

Why the Male Orgasm Is Not as Simple as Everyone Tries to Tell You – Beducated Magazine

Meditate During Orgasm, Oral Sex for Him, Sure You’re Sex-Positive?

Here are some links to great articles that will help you understand how to practice Orgasmic Sex…

(Sorry you haven’t heard from me much this summer.  I was on an extended wilderness camping vacation. But home now with lots of blog posts brewing. The better news is I’m making great progress on my Tantric Novel.)

Meditate During Orgasm to Bring More Enlightenment Into The OMG-YES-YES-YESSS – Beducated Magazine

The Boys’ & Girls’ Guide to Giving Great Head Part 1: Essential Oral Tips for Fellatio or Blowjobs.

8 Ways To Be Positive You’re Sex Positive – The Frisky