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SUBJECT: Explicit Tantric Tips To Supercharge Spiritual Love
Intimacy, Truth, & Communication: The Keys to Spiritual
Relationship Growth & The Hottest Sex Imaginable
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"Tantric Sex Tips from Sacred Sexual Secrets Newsletter" 1-26-05
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Published by Dhyan Somraj Pokras & Dhyan Jeffre TallTrees
ISSN 1540-8825 (c) Copyright 2005 by Tantra At Tahoe
P.S. Scroll to the bottom for addresses to click on or to unsubscribe.
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In this edition we're continuing our all-out effort to help you have the
most awesome Valentine's Day ever. Do we practice what we preach?
You bet. We're spending two nights in a classy South Lake Tahoe
resort. With one X-rated show, a day of ecstatic skiing, and a long
night of Tantric Sex, we're celebrating this special lover's day right. Will
you? Take our advice here, from our free web pages, and our
immediately downloadable ebooks, and you're sure to make V-Day
memorable.
We, Jeffre and Somraj, were recently musing about why some recent
Supreme Bliss Tantra clients were struggling more than we expected.
As a result, we recognized some communication patterns that seem to
be pervasive with the couples and singles we work with. We think it's
important enough to share with you, dear reader, because we want you
to have the deepest relationships and the best sex you can possibly
have.
We've said before, and we'll surely say again, that relationship is one
of the most powerful tools for spiritual growth. Similarly and not
separately, Tantric sexuality is also a powerful tool for spiritual growth.
In relationship, confronting yourself is the vehicle for rapid expansion.
In Tantric sex, the confronting of your sexual self that promotes
quantum leaps. So you can see, these two are overlapping,
interdependent, and intertwined for most of us.
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The Most Readily Available Spiritual Growth Tool
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Let's start with relationship and the vehicle that's most readily
available for scrutiny: communication. Of course, you're aware that
there are non-verbal communications as well as verbal
communications. Theses too, are interrelated.
Language and communication experts tell us that the actual words only
make up 7% of a communication. Everything else is non-verbal, such
as tone, facial expression, inflection, body language and context. That's
why, in Jeffre's relationship playbook, "Hotter Sex, Deeper Love," the longest chapter is Communication. It's the most comprehensive and complex process in an intimate relationship.
How deep your intimacy is depends on your level of psychological
development, how much you love yourself and what your relating habits
are. All too sadly, average men or women tend to expect,
unconsciously, that their partner is going to make them happy or in the
case of sex, satisfy them all the time. We're taught from childhood
onward, that if something is wrong, then someone must be at fault,
there must be someone to blame.
We certainly don't want to blame ourselves now do we? So, guess
what? We blame our partner. The Tantric spiritual path suggests a
different response. When two people want a more intimate relationship
they have to look at themselves as the source of their own joy and
commit themselves to problem solving thoroughly with their partner.
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Intimacy Is Based On Truth-Telling
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Intimacy is based solely on your willingness to tell the truth and
release your fear of being judged. Wow, are we ever programmed heavily
into being concerned about what others think. We have to move beyond
that and recognize that each of us, and that means YOU, is a divine
being, a spark of All That Is with enormous power and enormous
freedom. As our favorite spiritual teacher says, "You
have so much freedom, you can choose to tie yourself up, put yourself
in jail, or make yourself sick and miserable."
Intimacy is when you let your partner see the real you and your partner
let's you see the real them, regardless of your feelings and
shortcomings. We call this truth-telling or just plain honesty. In order
to be truthful about feelings, failures and desires, we all have to
examine our true motivations. Do we speak to simply share a piece of
ourselves?
-- Or are we not completely forthcoming because we're afraid of our
partner's reactions?
-- Or do we hold back because we're not sure of our partner's
response?
-- Or do we try to manipulate or finesse the situation so we can get
something we're afraid we might not get?
A good way to tell if you're fully authentic and transparent is check
yourself. Remember, that's what Tantric spiritual growth is all about,
looking at yourself. Do you filter what you say when you're concerned
that…
-- He tends to get angry?
-- She tends to get defensive?
-- She or he tends to withhold sex when confronted?
Or do you hold back because you want to…
-- Protect his ego?
-- Avoid hurting her feelings?
-- Hide your own shame about what you really want?
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How Communication Influences Sex
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As you can probably imagine, this issue of intimacy, communication
and truth-telling has enormous implications when it comes to sex. The
bad news is that it's hard for most people to talk with their partner
about intimate sexual details. The good news is that practicing and
pushing yourself to communicate about sex can catapult your
relationship into the zone of ultimate intimacy. Once you start on this
path, it will make all future communications come much easier.
Here's what we see with the folks we work with. They tend to use
euphemisms for intercourse and sex, such as "being intimate," "being
with someone," "doing it," "going all the way," "going to bed," and
"making love"(even if it's a one night stand). Even "fucking" is a
euphemism if you think about it.
They also tend to not want to call their sexual genitals by their names.
We let them off the hook a bit by letting them use the ancient Sanskrit
words, Yoni and Vajra, for vagina and penis. We do this on purpose, to
take some of their shame off of the actual words, so they can talk more
freely about their genitals.
Why is communication so vital in bed? Well, imagine that there's a
couple (maybe you) in which one or both of the partners aren't getting
exactly what they desired during oral sex. What goes through your
head? How do you describe exactly what you want without putting your
lover down at the worst possible time? How can you show, tell or
describe to your beloved what it is you want changed?
If you don't have the skill and willingness to be verbally intimate right
there and then, you probably won't like the end result? Sadly, the
incomplete communication produces frustration, disinterest, and hurt
feelings. Without feeling safe and comfortable to broach the subject,
someone will never be getting what they want. More than just feelings
take the brunt of these gaps: erections droop, lubrication and desire
dry up, and orgasms suffer.
Imagine a little further, this occurs during intercourse or any other
form of sexual play. What happens? One partner gets more and more
silent and resentful. The other may or may not know there is
something not right. Intimacy and trust begin to fade.....
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How Communication Influences Sex
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Our new beginners guide ebook, "Supreme Bliss Tantra," contains a
healthy dose of information about communication when you're ready to
partner for spiritual sex. Both our "Supreme Bliss Tantra" and "Intimacy"
ebooks give you lots of suggestions about how to change your
communication patterns in bed, while making love, and throughout
your entire relationship.
In honor of Valentine's Day, we're running a discount special so you
can get them together. We call it our Sacred Sexuality Package. See the
details of the deal below.
In our next issue we'll give you some specifics out of these practical
love guides that you can use before, during, and forever after
Valentine's Day.
Enjoy each other, enjoy sex, enjoy life. That's the bottom line of
Supreme Bliss Tantra.
Love, Dhyan Jeffre & Somraj
P.S. In our next issue, we'll offer some specific tools excerpted out of
our ebooks that you can use in your Valentine's Day ritual.
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Men and women can have it all by following the simple advice in
Jeffre's ebook "Hotter Sex, Deeper Love."
"Intimacy" tells you everything you need to know to use romance and
flirting to juice up your love life AND sweeten your relationship. We
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Jeffre's ebook is full of practical love advice, sex tips, and practical
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In our high-stress modern world, things only get better or get worse.
Little stays the same. Build your relationship tool kit or you may find
yourselves losing ground.
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"Intimacy" is the complete relationship guide with 213 pages jammed
with information about all aspects of sex, love and intimacy. It's the
ultimate how-to guide that together deepens your pleasure, your
intimacy, and your relationship endurance. Love, sex, and spirit aren't
separate, they're integral parts of your life. "Intimacy" shows you how
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No longer will you wonder what or how to do things for your love and
sex lives. Written by two sex therapists who've been counseling
couples for a combined total of over 50 years, "Intimacy "is the candid
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passionate bed play for 50 years or more.
The ebook begins with chapter about "What Is Sex?" and "What Are
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focuses on a separate topic with action steps you can take right away
to transform your relationship dynamics.
25 Chapters Of Fun & Growth
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The chapters are built around one or more practices to help you rapidly
integrate the concepts into your life. This means that "Intimacy"
contains over 50 simple activities ranging from...
- learning to talk about and enjoy self-pleasuring,
- dealing with your own and your beloved's anger,
- how you rescue each other when you should give space,
- what to do to make oral sex hot and fun,
- safely exploring the secret power hidden away in anal sex and
- how to make loveplay sacred so you can enjoy Spiritual Sex.
Romance, passion, arousal, initiating sex - the 25 chapters cover so
much territory that would take you a lifetime of fumbling around to
figure out. Let's not forget love and affection just to mention a few
more to the topics covered.
Though we're sure you've heard before the maxim that "Intimacy" is
based on, but it's worth repeating...
Great sex is learned, it isn't natural.
Why not start now having better sex, better communication and more
feelings of love and connectedness.
Here's what some readers say... "It changed my life and my
relationship. If I had know it would be so easy, I'd have begun this
process much earlier. I never even knew what great sex was before.
Thank you from both of us."
--A & SH
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