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Your Tantra Newsletter: Is Tantra About Living Or Loving?
How To Be Desireless At The Height Of Desire

A lot of people get involved in Supreme Bliss Tantra to have better sex or improve their relationship. How about having cosmic orgasms, learning to last for hours, becoming a highly skilled lover, giving mind-blowing pleasure, or awakening powerful new triggers culminating in celestial ecstasy singly or together.

All very doable good pursuits for those dedicated to practice the art and science of Tantra. But that's not where this spiritual practice dating back thousands of years to ancient India started.

Tantra grew out of grass-roots movement to help people reach higher states of consciousness towards enlightenment. Or as Buddha portrayed it, to become free from the never-ending life-death cycle of struggle. A laudable goal to be sure.

But you might ask what does that have to do with you when your honey isn't getting off or you're not getting along very well. Well, a lot. I'd like to say something about having your cake and eating it too but I don't want to sink to the level of dirty jokes when I'm trying to make a serious point.


"Sacred Sexual Secrets" Newsletter 9/28/13
Published by Somraj Pokras & Jeffre TallTrees
ISSN 1540-8825 (c) Copyright 2013 by
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This free ezine (scroll to the end if you want to stop them) offers practical sex tips derived from modern sex research and the ancient wisdom of Tantra and the Kama Sutra. We teach Supreme Bliss Tantra to help you deepen relationship intimacy and reach astounding heights of sexual ecstasy through long-distance learning and hands-on training. Our Motto: Deeper Into The Heart Of Sex

You see, Tantric Sex was developed and practiced as a fun way to improve yourself and your relationship. It become abundantly clear in my life 15 years ago when Jeffre and I the yearlong Tantric Love And Ecstasy training. (You can check out our new and improved version of this intensive initiation here… .)

Sure, we learned a lot about longer lovemaking, erotic touch, G-Spot orgasm, oral pleasure, and so much more that I hadn't realized how little I really knew about. But for me it seemed the sensual lessons were more about me, my life, and what was going on inside.

Here's an example. Midway through the year, we were studying the very Tantric aptitude of becoming desireless at the height of desire. Well, at first glance that sure sounds contradictory, doesn't it? Let me explain.

In Supreme Bliss Tantra, desire - wanting something strongly, which certainly includes wanting to feel and share sexual pleasure - is highly celebrated. That's why we support any positive or uplifting desire not matter how outlandish or kinky. We believe desire emanates from your inner being, that it's a spiritual expression of your life-force. Maybe that's not where the slogan "Go For It!" came from, but it applies fully.

Fundamental to the Tantric Attitude is that our true nature is one of bliss. We believe that happiness is our native state, that we should wring every drop of fun out of the myriad opportunities life offers us, that we should take full advantage of our bodies to produce a nearly unlimited flood of sexual joy. In other words, it's good to desire and get excited. It takes you back to your roots.

Growing up in our sex-negative culture, living with more and more stress, struggling with seemingly unsolvable problems -- all these things condition us away from feeling good and pursuing what we want. To combat these modern debilitating pressures, an essential pathway of Tantra training and practice is to stimulate, welcome, and increase desire.

OK then, desire is good. So why would you want to become "desireless?"

Because being attached to anything -- getting off, making your baby come, having more money, or whatever -- actually makes it harder to achieve your desires. Attachment is one of those spiritual concepts that gurus try to teach us to drop. "I've got to get that promotion. I really need that new outfit to look good enough to catch that fella's eye. I've got to make her love me the way I love her." These kinds of inner demands disturb, distract, and even obsess your inner peace. Buddhists see attachment as a prime cause of suffering.

Being desireless means letting whatever happens happen. It means accepting without judging. It means letting go of insisting on controlling the future. It means not leading with your ego. The Beatles sang it "Let It Be."

If you can really learn to be desireless, you can do a better job of being in the now, of being more sensitive to what's happening around you and what you're feeling inside, of being more conscious of yourself and the energy you're sending and receiving. All this makes for a happier life, a happier love, a stress-free existence.

And a great place to practice is in bed. Because being super turned on without an agenda and just letting things flow takes you to new and amazing places.

So in Supreme Bliss Tantra, we encourage you to get more turned on to life, to love, to your lover. To have more and better sex and to enjoy it more. And to not worry about how you're doing or where it's going. "If she's gonna come, great. If not, that's fine." "You want me to do something different? Well, sure why not!" "You really want to have sex there? Well, that sounds like fun."

But it's not easy, it's not automatic. Sometimes when we're making love our head is swirling with all sort of contradictory thoughts. Our needs are squawking, our insecurities are flaming, our buttons are getting pushed. When you train yourself to be desireless at the height of desire, all this fades away. Your sexual energy flows more freely, you get more in sync with your partner's desires, your life-force expands.

That's what happened to me in my yearlong Tantra training. When I was learning how to excite myself or my beloved's body, I was looking at my contrary reactions, at my internal blockages to enjoying what I wanted, at the false programming that was making me suffer instead of having fun. Tantric Sex practice became an inside job, and not necessarily via intercourse. I began erasing and rewriting the programs that directed my sexual machine. And it turned out those programs were also controlling the way I interacted with my beloved, my friends, and my work.

So to enjoy more desires without being swept away, to be more unattached and still play full out, I had to change. As a result, my beliefs gradually shifted, my behavior became different, and my outlook improved. Pleasure in all things rose to high priority. Resistance, which all Trekkies know is futile, receded to the background much more.

Playing, enjoying, satisfying - these are the things take center stage now. That's a big part of why we live in the forest of the Sierra Nevada Mountains. Skiing together and with buddies in the winter, and biking, hiking, and camping with our dogs the rest of the year - these are more important than ever.

Yes, this applies to work, too. I only try to do things that bring me joy. Sometimes that's Tantric Sex Coaching with clients ( or conducting Private Tantra Workshops ( Sometimes it's home improvement projects in my workshop. Sometimes it's maintenance on our computers. And since we're mountain folks, sometimes that means collecting, splitting, and stacking firewood. With the right attitude and good timing, it's all fun.

One pivotal outcome is how I decide what to do in every moment. I still have the mental programs that try to tell me what I should do, what's right, what other's would approve of. But I'm much more sensitive to the messages from my inner being, the clear though sometimes quiet guidance that comes through as a more pure desire. I'm much more in touch with what I truly want.

So which do you want, better sex or a better life? Why not use Supreme Bliss Tantra to achiever both.

Love, Somraj


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Supreme Bliss is the zenith of sexual ecstasy which transforms orgasmic energy into expanded consciousness.

Supreme Bliss Tantra is the modern system of personal transformation based on the ancient Eastern spiritual path which uses sexual energy practices to...
- deepen love and intimacy,
- extend lovemaking, and
- create continuous full-body mind-altering Tantric Orgasms.

By opening your senses of the present moment, embracing all of life and all of your being, and focusing on pleasure as a divine gift, Supreme Bliss Tantra...
- heals your mind, body, and spirit,
- connects you passionately with your deeper self and your beloved, and
- immerses you deeply into the untold joys of sacred sexuality to
reach cosmic peaks of pleasure to make life an ecstatic journey in total communion with all that is.

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We respect the privacy of our readers. We NEVER provide our subscriber list to ANYONE. The information contained in this document represents the current view of Tantra At Tahoe on the issues discussed as of the date of publication. We provide this free advice in the hopes that your conscious use will improve your sexual life. If you have a medical or psychological condition, please contact your health professional before acting on this advice. Our guidance is not intended as medical or psychological treatment, psychotherapy, or services best performed by a health professional. Information provided in this document is provided "AS IS" without warranty of any kind, either expressed or implied. You assume the entire risk as to the accuracy and the use of suggestions in this document. Without our personal services, your results may vary.

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