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Your Tantra Newsletter: Would You Rather Talk Dirty Or Be Proper?
Another Hard Look At How Sex Positive You Really Are
"Sacred Sexual Secrets" Newsletter 8/27/08
Published by Somraj Pokras & Jeffre TallTrees
ISSN 1540-8825 (c) Copyright 2008 by TantraAtTahoe.com
This free ezine offers practical sex tips derived from modern
sex research and the ancient wisdom of Tantra and the Kama
Sutra. We teach Supreme Bliss Tantra to help you deepen
relationship intimacy and reach astounding heights of sexual
ecstasy through long-distance learning and hands-on training.
Our Motto: Deeper Into The Heart Of Sex
If you don't want our newsletter, scroll to the end to stop them.
What kind of language is appropriate for a dedicated practitioner of Supreme Bliss Tantra? If you're really in love, is talking dirty OK? Or is that only for hookers and cock suckers?
Now don't get offended. Some of my best friends are cock suckers and I really respect how they've embraced their sexual practices and sexual preferences. Have you?
We're continuing looking into what you really think about sex and spirit in this issue's featured article. Please get involved and give your opinions on our new blog at http://www.tantraattahoe.blogspot.com where you can post your comments, ask your questions, and see what the tens of thousands of others on this email list think about it.
This issue contains...
* Tantric Quote: "Number One Before I Die"
* Juicy Joke: "Lucky?"
* Featured Ebook: "Hotter Sex Deeper Love"
* Featured Article: "Would You Rather Talk Dirty Or Be Proper?"
* Juicy Joke: "How Sweet Is 7 Times One Night?"
* Tantric Quote: "Open Parachute"
* How To Save Over $45 On Our Ebooks
Have you seen our new Tantric Erotic Art Gallery here http://www.tantraattahoe.com/erotic-tantric-art.htm ? Let us know if the free images turn you on the way they do us.
Love from Tantra At Tahoe who is...
Somraj & Jeffre
P.S. You can easily find our growing assortment of free Guided
Tours about Tantra, Kama Sutra, & Better Sex here...
Tantric Quote: "Number One Before I Die"
"I have a list I made when I was twelve of
things I wanted to do before I die. Omigosh...
how embarrassing. Number One: Touch a
boobie.: -- Drew Carey
Juicy Joke: "Lucky"
Mike and Steve are talking about their respective
weekends when the subject of picking up ladies
"I must say I am doing fine in that department,"
says Mike. "This weekend I hooked up with that
new secretary Jenny Smith."
"Jenny Smith!" Steve exclaims, "What happened?"
"Let us just say I got lucky."
"I have heard about Jenny," Steve says, "and
I would not call it lucky."
"I would," Mike says smugly.
"In that case," Steve replies, "you are the luckiest
guy with herpes I know!"
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Featured Article: "Would You Rather Talk Dirty Or Be Proper?"
Another Hard Look At How Sex Positive You Really Are
In my last article here, http://www.tantraattahoe.com/news/08192008.htm and on our new blog here http://www.tantraattahoe.blogspot.com , I started a dialogue about what it means to really believe, feel, and act in a sex positive way. I promised to continue the discussion by relating some of my own past sexual experiences.
They might seem embarrassing at first glance, but that’s all part of the programming we’ve been subjected to about developing our erotic maturity. We all start as fumbling novices and the sooner we celebrate stuff like coming too soon, faking it, and always having a headache, the sooner we can wake up and smell the delightful fluids soaking the sheets.
Teenage Sex Parties in Sweden
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To begin, I’m reminded of stories my first wife told of teenage parties in Sweden during the 1960s. When I was an over-juiced and under-sexed teenager in the States, it was common knowledge that Swedes were sexually free and uninhibited. My ex confirmed this by explaining how common it was for teenage school kids to hook up during parties.
Blowing in your dance partner’s ear meant “Wanna fuck?” Blowing back meant “Yes!” Interestingly, not reciprocating wasn’t really a big deal which demonstrates a real healthy attitude towards sex. Just because you’re sex-positive doesn’t mean you want do it with everybody, don’t you agree?
Well, back then, I did want to do it with everybody. Mostly because of all those years growing up as a horny teenage in the San Fernando Valley near L.A. (yeah, I’m a Valley Guy.) I guess I was partly drawn to my Swedish wife because she adopted the young-people’s party philosophy that “whatever turns you on is OK.” Oddly, she never participated back in those days.
So do you think her classmates were more sex-positive than she was as a kid? I certainly found that to be the case.
Hey, Mom, I’d Like My Eggs Over Easy (Like Me)
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Then there was my friend Dutch friend Joke (pronounced “yoka”) who explained to us, and her English husband John, the acceptable dating practices of teenagers in Holland. If she was seeing a boy she really liked, it was totally cool to invite him home to spend the night with her and do it. Yes, in her bed in her bedroom in her family's house.
OK, that’s pretty sex-positive, don’t you think? But what was even more impressive was that her mother would bring them both breakfast in bed the next morning. We were all blown away with how liberated Dutch parents must have been, especially her husband who grew up in England.
During my first spiritual practice in the 1960s, I studied in England and assumed sex was honored as a natural part of life over there. I guess that was because the pop newspapers always included a large topless female photo just inside the front page. And also because the young women in my cult during the era of sexual liberation were happy to share their bodies with me freely. (Mind you, to be honest this was long before I knew what to do with them. I was a lucky post-teenager getting a lot but having trouble getting it up and lasting long enough at different times.)
I learned later that English society was founded on everything being proper. So "proper" that parents didn’t show any affection or talk about anything sexual in front of their children. A fellow student in my original Tantra training in the mid-1990s made their cultural position abundantly clear.
Having grown up in and gone to school in Great Britain during the 1970s, he was working actively to change his programmed mindset. Near the end of our yearlong training, he stood up in front of the 80 other students and proclaimed "I’ve discovered what genitals are! Growing up they were never mentioned. Since it wasn’t polite to use 'rude' words or talk about what you did with those body parts, I honestly suspected until now that genitals didn’t even exist."
Far Be It For Me To Put Dirty Words In Your Mouth, or Worse
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Since I can’t really justify how valid or universal stories about other countries morays are, I’m not trying to indict anyone or any culture here. Just giving anecdotes to raise questions in your mind about your open sexual openness and freedom. Contrast my English classmate's experience with the workshop I attended some years ago where we listed all the names for penis and vagina. Few words were respectful or even complimentary since 90% were truly rude or vulgar.
You probably wouldn’t be too pleased if someone called you a “cunt,” would you? Certainly, in today's vernacular that means a really bad woman or despicable man. But this word originally came from the ancient name of a revered female Goddess or possibly from Kunti, a mother in Hindu tradition revered in early myths by those who worship Krishna.
Because of the bastardization of sexual language, we use the Hindu word “yoni” for vagina and “vajra” for the penis which means “divine thunderbolt” in Sanskrit. These are sacred body parts that deserve to be honored. And swear words don't work too well.
How we use words reveals a lot about our attitudes. A dear friend of mine who is highly sex positive was dismayed recently when he discovered his new girlfriend, OK a mature woman in her sixties, would only use the term “down there” for her privates.
Oh boy, I just did it myself. "Privates" is another common euphemism instead of saying genitals, or our preferred term of "jewels."
Can Talking Dirty Be Spiritual?
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And while we’re on the subject of words, considering how many swear words really refer to activities that Tantrics consider sacred. Ever hear anyone sincerely reply to "Fuck you!" with "Thank you, I would be honored to"? And since most guys genuinely crave receiving oral sex, why is that calling someone a “cock sucker” is a put-down? Seems to me your complimenting that guy’s sexual repertoire.
Of course, the implication is probably that he’s really gay, which used to be socially crippling to admit to. Hopefully that's changing now that coming out of the closet is more acceptable. Heck, gays can even get married legally in many places including our home state of California.
Many Supreme Bliss Tantra students find themselves carrying their politically correct language into our Private Tantra Workshops http://www.tantraattahoe.com/service/tantra-workshop.htm . They talk about "being intimate" or "sensual" when they mean "making love" or "having sex." These puritanical attitudes that don't honor sex as a divine gift totally pollute most modern minds, even those that are actively striving to awaken Spiritual Sex in their minds, hearts, and relationships.
We don't encourage them to say "stick your dick in" instead of intercourse or jewel union. But haven't you ever found that in that hot, wet embrace with your main squeeze that her screaming "Fuck Me!" is a real turn-on? We certainly believe that real turn-ons are sacred, so why not talk dirty to amp up the sexual juice at times.
What do you think about talking dirty? I'm purposely using a wide range of language to get your reactions on our new blog http://www.tantraattahoe.blogspot.com .
Until next time, I remain your ex-horny but sexually-liberated Supreme Bliss Tantra mentor…
Juicy Joke: "How Sweet Is 7 Times One Night?"
There once was a religious young woman who went to confession. Upon entering the confessional, she said, 'Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.'
The priest said, 'Confess your sins and be forgiven.' The young woman said, 'Last night my boyfriend made mad passionate love to me seven times.'
The priest thought long and hard and then said, 'Squeeze seven lemons into a glass and then drink the juice.'
The young woman asked, 'Will this cleanse me of my sins?'
The priest said, 'No, but it will wipe that smile off of your face.'
Tantric Quote: "Open Parachute"
"Minds are like parachutes. They only function when they are open." -- Sir James Dewar, Scientist (1877-1925)
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11200 Donner Pass Road #146, Truckee, CA 96161
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The information contained in this document represents the
current view of Tantra At Tahoe on the issues discussed as of the
date of publication. We provide this free advice in the hopes that
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