Subject: "What The Kama Sutra Says About Size And Intimacy
"S A C R E D S E X U A L S E C R E T S" Newsletter 3/27/03
Published by Dhyan Jeffre TallTrees & Dhyan Somraj Pokras
ISSN 1540-8825 (c) Copyright 2003 by Tantra At Tahoe
This is free ezine offers practical sex tips derived from modern
sex research and the ancient wisdom of Tantra and the Kama
Sutra. We teach Supreme Bliss Tantra to help you deepen
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This issue contains...
* Tantric Quote: "A Pillar Of Vibrating Energy"
* Juicy Joke: "Heard In A Neuropsychology Classroom"
* Friend's Feedback: "Orgasm Without Ejaculation"
* Featured Article: "What's The Kama Sutra Got To Do With
* Interesting Pubic Findings: "Most Famous Sexologist"
* Juicy Joke: ""The Rural Census Taker"
* Tantric Quote: "The River Of Love"
* Featured Product: "Intimacy Oil Experience"
* Friend's Feedback: "Been Looking For You"
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Dhyan Jeffre & Dhyan Somraj
"A Pillar Of Vibrating Energy"
...the solid bodies of the two lovers begin pulsating as if charged with electricity. The feeling of having solid flesh disappears. You are suddenly a pillar of vibrating energy held in exquisite balance by your lovers field of energy. This is a total orgasm of body and soul.
---MANTAK CHIA from Taoist Secrets Of Love
"Heard In A Neuropsychology Classroom"
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"What's The Kama Sutra Got To Do With Supreme Bliss?"
Have you heard of the Kama Sutra, the Hindu love manual nearly
2000 years old? Most have thanks to the courageous translation
of Sir Richard Burton during the 19th century (a much earlier
nobleman with the same name as the well-known English actor).
Tantra, the ancient Eastern art and science of sacred sexuality,
is much broader, richer, and older. Secret Tantric writings
began some 7000 years ago and dealt with all energies -- body,
mind, emotion, spirit -- as a path to liberation and
enlightenment. In contrast, the Kama Sutra was merely a
depiction of sexual customs of India during the early centuries of the common era.
So what is this modern fascination in the West with this once-
obscure sex manual?
He Didn't Pull Any Punches
- - - - - - - - - - -
Maybe it's because of the forthrightness of the author, Mallinaga
Vatsyayana, about things we're too ashamed or embarrassed to
talk about today. Though we don't know much about him, we do
know that he was a sage and religious scholar who lived in
Pataliputra, India between Benares and Calcutta sometime
between 200 and 500 AD.
And he didn't pull any punches. The Kama Sutra was the
definitive meticulous guide to sexual etiquette of the times.
What's It Really About?
- - - - - - - - - - -
What was the purpose of this treasured window into the past?
You might have read that Kama Sutra means "love songs." This
sounds wonderful but isn't particularly accurate.
Kama is often defined as love, a pretty broad term that means
different things to different people at different times. More
exactly, this "kama" is about desire and pleasure derived from
"Kama is the enjoyment...by the five senses of hearing, feeling,
seeing, tasting, and smelling, assisted by the mind together with
A simple definition of sutra is rule, which would make the
meaning of the book "Rules Of Pleasure." More accurately, a sutra
was an aphorism, the briefest possible statement of a principle.
Back then, few people could read and write. The common
practice was to condense knowledge into sutras which could be
Vatsyayana compiled the customs of his era into these short
pithy sayings. Unless you understand the history and depth
behind the sutras, it's easy to misunderstand or miss his points
By the way, the pursuit of pleasure was the only Tantric aspect of this treasured volume. Though it embraced the humanity it
portrayed, the Kama Sutra wasn't particularly spiritual. Rather,
it's emphasis was practical, pragmatic, detached, and almost
clinical about how the wealthy dedicated their lives to sensuality.
They Didn't Need A Sexual Revolution
- - - - - - - - - - -
Maybe our curiosity in this old book of sayings stems from living
in a sex-negative society, one that doesn't accept, value, or
embrace erotic play as an essential part of life.
To truly benefit from studying the Kama Sutra, you have to
recognize that it was all about another time and place.
It was a highly sex-positive culture very foreign to ours today. It documented the erotic lifestyle of the most privileged upper
class for whom luxury, intrigue, and the pursuit of pleasure were
foremost pastimes. Many were obsessed with sex and seduction.
Pre-marital and extra-marital sex were common and accepted.
Maybe our Kama Sutra fascination comes from its thorough
categorization of sexual techniques. Things "nice girls" don't
share much about today and, regardless of what they claim, few
young guys' in the locker room know much about.
The good news is that Vatsyayana carefully documented the
amorous and sexual practices of his day. In BC times, this was
done mostly through oral tradition. Mores and morays were first
written down around the dawn of the common era. Though he
did contribute his views, Vatsyayana served primarily as editor to collect and compile the vast storehouse of Hindu erotology
written by others that existed by the first century.
Finishing School For Lovers
- - - - - - - - - - -
Or maybe we're all just craving the kind of initiation,
indoctrination, and training in this vital part of life. Rites of
passage at the time of puberty aren't common today as they were
in many ancient indigenous cultures. As part of their education,
young people of Vatsyayana's time were educated in sexuality,
loveplay, and the 64 arts,...
"The preliminaries to sexual intercourse...the body of erotic
treatises...considered as forming part of the practice of love."
We expect that much of the great appeal of the Kama Sutra today
is it's down-to-earth advice about foreplay, extending the sex act, and giving maximum pleasure. As teenage hormones begin to
rage, who wouldn't be captivated by the wide variety of
embracing, petting, caressing, kissing, scratching, biting, and
copulating the historic volume detailed? If allowed by social
customs, that is.
Shocking by today's standards, the Kama Sutra even classified
lovers according to several characteristics, including their
jewels (Tantric for genitals). Much of its advice about lovemaking centers around sexual positions for the union of equal and unequal sized jewels.
Since it was a compendium of the customs of the times, the
Kama Sutra also went into great detail about how to acquire a
wife, behave once married, seduce other men's wives, and treat
courtesans. I missed that course in school. Did you?
Do You Worry About The Size Of Your Jewels?
- - - - - - - - - - -
We suspect that another reason for the Kama Sutra's modern
popularity is the average man's insecurity about pleasing women.
Come on guys, lighten up, we're not putting your monstrous love
skills down. Or your monstrous love tool, either, for that matter.
It just doesn't take much exposure to the media, email spam, or
web adult sites to recognize how many modern lovers believe
that size matters, especially of the male sex organs.
Now really, does it? Taoism, the version of Tantra based largely
on Chinese medicine, declares in one of its key texts...
"The shape and hardness with which Nature has endowed a man
are only external signs. What appears internally is the skill with which he ensures that a woman derives enjoyment from his
lovemaking. If a woman really cares for a man as he cares for
her, then it is totally irrelevant whether his organ is long or
short, thin or thick...A long, thick organ is often worse for a
woman than a short thin one that is firm and hard. And a firm,
hard organ that is pushed and pulled out in a crude manner is
worse than a soft one that is moved about delicately and with
We've had this ancient sentiment confirmed many times by many
Poor Men Laboring Against The Double Standard
- - - - - - - - - - -
And while we're on the subject of size, ever notice the double
standard? If a tight fit of sexual organs really determines
pleasure, why don't we judge women on the size of their yonis?
The average unexcited yoni is 4 inches deep, ample enough for
the overwhelming majority of vajras in the world. What's the
openness of the average yoni? Zero. Yes, at rest, yoni walls press against each other. So just about any vajra can make adequate contact with enough of yoni to create the seeds of great
pleasure, provided both know how to make the most of it.
Women today are rarely judged on what counts more to the
pleasure of both her and her partners, the strength of her
vaginal muscles. In the Orient and elsewhere, skilled female
lovers developed their sexual muscles (PC for pubococcygeal) to
the point where they could grip, milk, and make any man's vajra
orgasm without any other movement.
The Tamils of Southern India called this skill of yoni muscle
control "pompoir." In the Arabic world, a woman who had
mastered the use of her PC muscles during sex was called
"kabbazah," or holder. In these places and elsewhere, female love
skills were honored, respected, and revered.
To be fair about the double standard, the western world does
judge women on size as well-- of their breasts, as the booming
business in implants confirms. But breast size - or the size of any sexual organ - has little to do with sensitivity. So size is rarely the determining factor in how much pleasure you receive. And size has little to do with how much pleasure you can give.
What's Really Important
- - - - - - - - - - -
This whole discussion demonstrates that too many people don't
have a clue what counts in the sack to the average woman. Which
is, by the way, why Jeffre wrote her fantastic playbook, "Hotter Sex, Deeper Love." Click here for more details... <http://www.tantraattahoe.com/int.htm>.
So maybe part of its appeal is that the Kama Sutra's classification of jewel size largely resolved the realities of anatomy. Yes, there are bigger vajras and smaller vajras, just as there are wider, deeper, and stronger yonis and their opposites. If you act on the pragmatic guidelines of the Kama Sutra, you'll learn how to use your assets more skillfully by preparing, practicing, and compensating.
This article was excepted from our upcoming ebook, "Awakening
The Sacred Gate Of Supreme Bliss: Tantric Secrets Of G-Spot
Orgasm & Female Ejaculation." Watch your email for its
Wishing you love and ecstatic Tantric sex,
Dhyan Jeffre & Somraj
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Dhyan Jeffre TallTrees, Ph.D., cofounder of Supreme Bliss
Tantra, is an author, speaker, workshop leader, and licensed
SkyDancing Tantra Teacher with over 30 years of clinical
experience in relationships and human sexuality. Jeffre is co-
author of "Hotter Sex, Deeper Love."
Dhyan Somraj Pokras, cofounder of Supreme Bliss Tantra, is the
author of countless articles about Tantra, over 50 workshops,
and 4 books including "Ultimate Ejaculation Mastery." During his
30 year career as a speaker, counselor, personal coach, group
facilitator, and workshop trainer, Somraj has guided more that
20,000 people to lead more ecstatic and effective lives.
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Interesting Pubic Findings
"Most Famous Sexologist"
Alfred Charles Kinsey bestrides the sexological world like a
giant. His two reports on the sexual behavior of the human male
and female respectively (1948 and 1953) have no equals before
or since in their scope, thoroughness or the richness of their
data. Kinsey has been criticized in his methods (so have Marx,
Darwin, and Freud); but where is the sexologist in the modern
world who does not owe a debt to Kinsey? All serious sexological
social surveys, all compilers of statistical and other information in this field, all specialist writers on one aspect of sex or another sooner or later have to acknowledge the pioneering work of Kinsey at the institute he founded at Indiana University. There can be no doubt that the headline-making work of Masters and Johnson is well grounded in the firm empirical approach established by Kinsey.
----- From The Illustrated Book of Sexual Records
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"The Rural Census Taker"
A census taker in a rural area went up to a farmhouse and
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She said, "Les' see now, there's the twins, Sally and Billy, they're eighteen. And the twins, Seth & Beth, they're sixteen. And the twins, Penny and Jenny, they're fourteen."
"Hold on!" said the census taker, "Did you get twins every time?"
The woman answered, "Heck no, there were hundreds of times
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"The River Of Love"
Love can only flow from the heights of bliss. The river of love
only comes out of the peak of bliss.
---- OSHO from "The Song Of Ecstasy"
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Dhyan Jeffre TallTrees & Dhyan Somraj Pokras
(Dhyan is a prefix meaning "meditation.")
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