Here are links to some great articles that will help you understand and enjoy Orgasmic Sex…
5 Tips For An Earth-Shattering Orgasm You HAVEN’T Already Tried – mindbodygreen
Here are links to some great articles that will help you understand and enjoy Orgasmic Sex…
5 Tips For An Earth-Shattering Orgasm You HAVEN’T Already Tried – mindbodygreen
My sweetie likes it a lot when I play with her clio (clit) while we’re fucking. How can I tell? Well, it’s downright obvious when she bucks and howls in sync with my finger strokes.
We’ve fucked maybe 2000 times in our 21 years together. So how is it that I keep stumbling on new moves that move her? Just luck? No, I think it’s the dedicated practice of Orgasmic Sex. Let me explain.
We we’re stroking away last night in our favorite position when we’re tired and stoned: the scissors with her on her back and me on my side at a right angle.
I was stroking her erect clio with my middle finger at the same time that my first and third fingers were fiddling around the edges. After about 15 minutes, her reactions made it clear that she wanted something even stronger. So I started tapping her swollen pearl which made her butt keep bouncing up to meet my fingers.
When your lover pushes back in rhythm, you know what you’re doing is working. But one side effect was that it made vajra’s strokes (Tantric for penis) shallower. As a result, my cock head was vigorously rubbing just inside yoni’s mouth (vagina) on her outlet. That’s the most exposed end of her G-spot where her urethral canal opens to the outside world. Because the spongy tissue surrounding the canal is so sensitive, this vajra stroke excited her even more.
That’s when I invented a new thrilling new move. Actually it was an accident. Because my vajra was entering at a sharp angle from below and prodding just inside the upper wall of yoni’s mouth, it popped out across her clio. In Orgasmic Sex we have a don’t panic rule when something untoward happens. So I slightly shifted my finger taps onto my cock head and pushed it back in without missing a beat.
Her higher-pitched squeal confirmed that I was onto something worthwhile. So I repeated the move over and over. Eventually it morphed into me pushing vajra’s head down across her erect pearl and her outlet with my fingers on vajra’s in-stroke. I lightened the pressure from my fingers on the out-stroke which let my erect cock head emerge. Pushing in again allowed my vajra to polish her clio upwards. In effect, I was alternating pushing inside her yoni and rubbing across her vestibule. That’s the courtyard inside the inner lips from yoni’s mouth across the outlet and up to clio’s base.
I never read about this sexual stroke in all my studies of the Kama Sutra and Tantric texts. I guess it goes to show that Orgasmic Sex never gets old and boring if you pay attention and go with the flow.
Let me know how you like my new Pearl Polishing stroke. And I look forward to hearing about new strokes that you invent, too.
The average length of sexual encounters is 5 to 10 minutes. Totally understandable because it’s so exciting. I often get swept away into a blaze of glory, too.
But when someone practices extended energy sex routinely as I do, they enter a totally different zone. By surfing from peak to peak of startling excitement instead of exploding, the whole experience changes. It changes from instant gratification to seeing how high I can make every cell in my body.
Until I dedicated myself to prolonging my pleasure, I barely noticed the currents of sensation streaming throughout my body.
In Tantra we call it sexual energy. My latest book Long Hot Tantric Love Making defines it this way…
The electromagnetic life force in the human body responsible for attraction, sexual desire, libido, sex drive, turn-on, and orgasm. Lovers experience it as a flow of nervous stimulation, physical excitation, and moving sensations.
During my recent self-pleasuring sessions, I’ve been watching the ebbs and flows and movement of sexual energy. While surfing from crest to crest of pleasure peaks, I’ve become more aware of what’s actually happening in my body.
I don’t have to convince you that the most powerful sexual energy comes our of your jewels (genitals). When I play with myself, not only does blood fill my vajra (penis) making it erect, but it gets way more sensitive. Before I knew how to spread the excitement out of my jewels, it quickly got more than I could handle.
When I channel the sexual energy away from my jewels, it feels like electricity running through the rest of my body.
The more aware of sexual electricity I am, the longer I can make the zenith of pleasure last. You know, that irresistible force right before you come that feels so amazing.
By opening the energy conduits, I can spread the excitement which allows me to go higher for longer than I ever imagined. Feeling like I’m coming continuously. Orgasms that last so much longer than the typical 10-second sneeze. Sometimes minutes or more.
I guess that makes me a sexual electrician.
It’s a job title I’ve long aspired to. And a badge of office I will wear proudly. That’s because it’s sexual electricity that makes sex feel so sensational.
If you’re interested, here’s my first course outline for Sexual Electricity 101. It’s the primer for orgasmic sex leading to full-body orgasm. Hopefully appearing soon at major universities and elementary schools everywhere.
Your Sexual Energy Generator
Your jewels are powerful sexual energy generators. The hotter your sex, the more energy you create. The longer your sex, the more energy you create. The better your technique — or that of your lover — the more energy you create.
It feels so fucking good that you want more. And want it to last.
But it’s so intense when it’s compressed into the small zone of your groin. So you spread it. The buzzing and sizzling of your tissues widens and expands. This makes more of your body feel sensational.
And without all of your body feeling sensational, full-body orgasm is unlikely.
When I say “sensational,” I don’t just mean super exciting. I mean bubbling and percolating, roiling and boiling, and overflowing with sensation.
That’s what happens when the sexual electricity flows through your organs, muscles, and bones. Your nerves vibrate making your organs quiver, your muscles shiver, and your bones pulse. And the more all of this happens, the stronger the sensations.
So when you consciously open the energy valves, these sensations stream up and down your body. Ever curled your toes while coming? Ever felt your knees quake? Ever felt your legs bouncing off the bed? Well, that’s the energy descending.
Since there’s a lot more of you from the waist up, you need even more rising energy to blow your mind. To make your heart beat faster, your fingertips spark, your eyes roll, and your scalp tingle.
Sexual Electricity Patterns
I find sexual electricity follows certain patterns when it rises through me.
To understand them, let’s review what Thomas Edison discovered. When electrons flow in one direction through a wire from a battery to a light bulb, we call it DC or direct current.
I don’t really know the complete physics of sexual electricity, but to continue my lesson let’s just assume there are sexual elections. Little particles of energy that excite what they land on.
Edison found that more electrons were lost and waisted when DC had to travel longer. So he used AC, alternating current, when the electrons jiggle back and forth without moving too far. If you’ve ever been shocked from an appliance in your home, you’ve felt AC. Your nerves and muscles pulsate intensely without going anywhere. That’s why it’s hard to let go.
When you open the floodgates around your jewels, sexual energy flows out. This electrical current follows nerves and more subtle channels like the ones acupuncturists and Tantric adepts work with.
I can actually feel the prickly sensations in my crotch soften as the current moves up and down. That’s what makes other parts of my body turn-on.
When my channels fill with sexual electricity, it feels like AC current to me. The parts of my body affected quiver and quake with pleasure.
Amps Versus Volts
Now for those who want to become qualified as sexual electricians, it’s essential to understand how to maximize that turn-on. Which requires understanding the difference between amps and volts.
Amps measures how much current is flowing. How many sexual electrons have you generated and directed somewhere.
Or to use the analogy of a river, amperage is how much water is flowing. How wide and deep the river is. The bigger the channel, the stronger the sensations spreading to the extremities.
When I only generate a little sexual electricity, I might not even get hard. With more current, I might find my skin tingling a few places. With top output, my whole body shakes and vibrates with heat and magnetism.
It’s as if there’s a conduit of sexual electricity from head to toe pulsing like a guitar string. Or a smaller banjo string. Or a larger bass fiddle string.
Sometimes I can keep that peak flow going for 30 to 60 minutes without stopping. Other less-exciting times it surges for a few seconds or minutes. One of my favorites is when a ball of sexual energy seems to erupt with an expanding blossom of sensation. Like a pleasure grenade exploding in different spots inside.
Sometimes that erotic current reaches my legs, my chest, my neck, my head. I can actually feel the sensations streaming from my groin.
When I can keep the flow going for some minutes, I can sense the sexual elections moving continuously. Other times I feel pulses and surges following my energy channels. From inside they look like streamers of fire that can erupt into fireworks.
We can’t ignore sexual magnetism while we’re at it. Did you know that an electric current creates magnetism? So when you’re flowing sexual energy, it magnetizes your skin, muscles, and bones. This force not only energizes your passion, but also attracts others. Maybe it’s part of the pheromone phenomenon.
Volts measure how fast the river is flowing, how much pressure the current creates, how charged your tissues are. Haven’t you noticed that sometimes you touch your jewels and it’s instantly electric? Really sensitive, I mean. Almost like a spark jumps from your sex organ to your hand, mouth, or another’s sex organ.
Obviously, most of us need high voltage to reach orgasm. Without enough sexual charge, your chances for full-body orgasm are slim.
When your sexual voltage is high, it pushes the sensations faster and further around your body. That is, as long as there’s enough energy to excite everywhere it touches.
Sexual voltage tends to dissipate unless it’s continuously reinforced. So most of the time when you’re still during sex, your excitement gradually decreases. And the faster you go, the more intense the electrical charge you build .
Confining your sexual electricity in a relatively small space, like your loins, keeps the voltage high. So your sensations are stronger. Spreading it all over tends to lower the excitement.
Now if you can generate enough sexual electricity to fill your whole body at high voltage, you’ll almost levitate with passion.
Which takes us to another part of the lesson, namely watts. Watts measure how much power an electrical current contains. So the more watts, the stronger your pleasure and the bigger your orgasms.
You calculate sexual watts — the impact of your experience — by multiplying amps times volts. So the more current you’re generating at higher voltages, the more intense your passion.
Now it’s natural, as you first get turned-on, to push against the erotic current. By tensing up, a skilled sexual electrician is trying to confine the electricity to a smaller space. This increases the voltage so your sensations are more intense. That’s partly why doing pelvic muscle exercises can strengthen your pleasure and orgasms.
But when you tense up while turned-on, you reduce the current flow.
As a sexual electrician’s arousal rises and their loins erupt into a sizzling pot of sexual excitement, they relax and consciously open the valves. The electricity flows out. How turned on they get all over their body depends on how much current and how charged the voltage they’ve generated. The sexual watts — amps times volts — determines how much sensation the rest of their body feels.
Why would you want to fill your whole body with a huge volume of high-voltage sexual electricity?
Why, for full-body orgasms of course. Try it, you’ll like it.
No Doubt There’s More to Come
I hope this primer inspires you to practice managing your sexual electricity.
I’ve called it the 101 entry level course because my intuition suggests there’s lots more to learn. I’m looking forward to my coming practice sessions.
I hope you are, too.
As much as we seek to release all attachment, many of us aging lovers are still attached to getting and maintaining our own or our partner’s erection.
While I don’t see anything spiritually wrong with medicines like Viagra, I prefer natural alternatives. Being a sexually-active 70-year-old male, I’ve tried many herbal potions with varying results. Although some are frauds, I want to offer my belated thanks to the Kama Sutra for introducing aphrodisiacs into the world.
Actually I don’t need much help getting it up. But being Tantrically trained, I love to make love several times a week for an hour or more at a time. So my erectile experiments have centered around staying hard as long as we’re having fun.
It turns out that my erection stamina has less to do with what I put in my body than what I let out. Or to be more accurate, how often I ejaculate.
According to ancient spiritual traditions like Tantra and Taoism , a man’s semen is his life essence. One venerable teacher called it “Original Spirit.” According to these bygone sexologists, spilling your seed decreases your vitality, energy, and libido. Which, of course, diminishes your ability to get and stay erect.
I have a friend who can come ten times in a row without much break. That’s never been me. Even as a young man my desire to do it again wouldn’t return for many hours. Now that I’m a sexy senior citizen, that’s become days. For me my most powerful virility option is repeatedly surfing on the edge of coming without squirting.
If your hackles just rose rise up in horror, bear with me. I know how good it feels to explode into a big wet spot. Or to push your male partner over that ecstatic precipice. I still remember that student years ago who refused to listen any further exclaiming, “You want me to give up my favorite part of sex? No way!”
One thing I learned from Tantra is that orgasm and ejaculation are two different things. So I said to him, “What if I could show you how to have orgasm after stronger orgasm for as long as you want instead?” That got his attention fast. It wasn’t too long afterwards that I published my Male Multiple Orgasm book about how to do just that.
When I released the goal of frequent orgasm and mentally pivoted towards longer pleasure instead, my erection stamina soared. Does this inspire you in any way to learn to float in a continuous and higher orgasmic state instead of pushing for a quick release?
My point is that we all need to find our own personal ejaculation frequency. For me, that’s every few weeks. I learned how to conserve my vital essence by studying two early traditions.
Tantra is an ancient Eastern spiritual practice that teaches how to harness the life forces that innervate body, mind, and spirit. Tantric adepts harness sexual energy to fuel consciousness, love, and enlightenment. When applied to lovemaking, conserving the energy of orgasm is essential. It was through Tantric practices that I mastered the art of multiple energy orgasms without ejaculating.
The study of Taoism has helped me as well. Taoism is an ancient Chinese philosophy about finding “the way” in harmony with natural order and the principles of yin and yang. Ancient Taoist physicians specialized in extending longevity. They gave men specific guidelines about how often to ejaculate based on age, strength, and health.
One such recommended schedule for strong males comes from Su Nü who wrote under the pseudonym the Plain Girl. She was a concubine of the famous Yellow Emperor during the Chinese Yin Dynasty 5000 years ago. Here’s what she advised: Teenagers can afford to ejaculate twice a day, while 30-year-olds can come daily. Men of 40 should ejaculate only once every three days and 50-year-olds only every five days. Men of 60 can release every ten days and those of 70 once a month. This famous concubine of the emperor doubled these durations for weaker men and advised weak 70-year-olds to give up ejaculating altogether.
Master Sun, born in 581 AD and lived for 101 years, prescribed a stricter schedule. He advised that men who could make love 100 times without an emission would live a very long life. Since few could achieve that, he suggested two ejaculations per month. His detailed schedule was: one emission every four days for 20-somethings, every eight days for 40-year-olds, and only once every 20 days for men in their 50s. He recommended those above 60 give it up altogether unless they were exceptionally healthy.
Chinese longevity specialists advised that every man needs to find his own right interval. Expert guidance to find my own way has always inspired my rebellious nature. When I first started enjoying extended Tantric lovemaking at 50, I came every time we made love. Several times a week was too often for me. I discovered that I could maintain my erections better if I limited my emissions to twice a week. Ten years later, once a week was necessary. Now a three-week schedule seems best.
The Taoist doctors advised that it was unhealthy to give up ejaculating altogether except in extreme circumstances. That’s been my experience, too. After quite a few lovemaking sessions I sometimes experience testicle pressure often called “blue balls.” Though there’s been little relevant scientific research, doctors say it’s nothing serious that isn’t resolved by coming. Fortunately, a little massage and energy-spreading breathwork resolves it quickly for me. Or I decide my body is telling me it’s time to release.
Undoubtedly, your mileage may vary. Mine does based on how I’m feeling physically and emotionally and how much action I’ve had recently. Hopefully I’ve given you enough grounding in the art and science of ejaculatory timing to find a schedule that keeps you hot and hard and virile well into old age. I figure with my expertise and experience I’ve got another few decades of Tantric sex ahead of me.
If you want more orgasmic sex, it helps to hit the right spot. Or more specifically, it helps to excite erogenous zones like the G-Spot. Those are areas of the body particularly sensitive to sexual stimulation.
Our latest ebook Long Hot Tantric Love Making describes how to take full advantage of a woman’s ten outer and nine inner pleasure spots. You can read all about them in our earlier blog post Tantra Newsletter: 19 Women’s Erogenous Zones – Part 1.
Though true, it’s a gross oversimplification to say that the jewels (genitals) are erogenous zones. Sure, playing with a guy’s vajra (penis) will usually turn him on. But if you know how to fondle, stroke, and lick his cock’s five specific erogenous zones, you’ll be even more indispensable to him. I’m referring to the head, crown, frenulum, shaft, and base. Soon I’ll add an article detailing all of these and more.
Yes, there are more. But a savvy male lover also knows how to us those five penile erogenous zones while thrusting inside his female playmate’s yoni (vagina). My January blog post entitled Intersecting Erogenous Zones focused on the deeper orgasmic trigger spots inside a woman. These are three areas at the upper end of the yoni around the cervix.
But last night we had an amazing encounter with my sweetheart’s shallower ones.
We had just had a talk about the unique characteristics of Eddie’s prick. He was the male partner of a couple we met many years ago at a sacred sexuality workshop and played with one fun night. Eddie’s vajra was rather thin but long and boney. Plus he was very astute about hitting the right spots with it. Especially her cul-de-sac. This is the erogenous zone past the cervix at the deepest point inside the yoni. When he prodded her there, she let out some of the most memorable shrieks. Memorable enough that we both remember the intense experience.
Now my vajra is long enough to reach her cul-de-sac when I’m super hard. But otherwise the head of my cock can be a bit spongy which apparently doesn’t prod that deep crevice in the best possible way. Last night, though, during jewel union (sexual intercourse) my erection excelled at boniness. So I made it a point to slide past her cervix into her cul-de-sac quite often. I knew each time I did because I heard those memorable shrieks.
Of course, that’s not the only sexual stroke I used. Women have taught me that variety always tops monotony. Unless they’re at a pleasure peak and want to go over the top.
But we weren’t there yet. We were having so much fun as I shifted from one kind of thrust to another, from one stroking pattern to another. (There are chapters in Long Hot Tantric Love Making that present the whole story about all those things in illustrated detail.)
Oddly enough, one sort of shallow stroke was evoking a strong reaction, too. A loud and jackknifing one. So I played with it a little more, shifting from deep long strokes to short jabs around yoni’s mouth.
As I changed angle, depth, speed, and pressure to target different spots, I realized rubbing her outlet was really turning her on.
“Outlet” is the name we use for what’s scientifically named the “urethral meatus.” It’s the opening of the tube that conducts urine out of the body from the bladder. The outlet lies on the top side of yoni’s mouth, usually just a bit inside the vaginal canal.
Because it’s highly sensitive, it’s a shame the outlet doesn’t get more of the attention it deserves. You see, it’s intimately connected with a woman’s G-Spot. Well, actually that’s a misnomer. What colloquially is called the G-Spot isn’t just one fixed spot. It actually refers to a whole series of little glands and ducts in the spongy tissue that surrounds the urethra. As a result, the whole area on the upper wall of the yoni can be aroused, awakened, and engorged producing unique and powerful sexual satisfaction.
But we’re focusing here on another erogenous zone, the outlet. Well, OK, the spongy tissue deemed the G-Spot extends into the outlet itself. So you might say it’s all part and parcel of the same pleasure organ. However you define it, massaging the outlet feels damn good to many women. Some adventuresome sorts even like something small and well-lubed — like a very gentle little finger — inserted a bit. Just be super clean and careful if you want to try this. Mistreatment can cause painful inflammation and damage.
There wasn’t any risk with what I was doing with my cockhead. No, the more I returned there, the more spectacular were her responses. After experimenting I found that her favorite in these moments were one to two inch strokes with crown of vajra’s head pressing firmly just inside yoni’s mouth.
That’s when her breathing changed in that special way that alerts me to her being close.
If you’ve read of my other articles or blog posts, you know that I always choose longies over quickies. It feels so good I just don’t want it to end. But, hey, after 15 minutes I got an offer I couldn’t refuse. “If you make me come, I’ll do you for as long as I can.”
So instead of switching things up, I kept up that short outlet stroke going continuously. She had several pleasure peaks which rose in intensity. Then to speed things up, she added just a little clitoral vibration from her favorite sex toy, the Pocket Rocket.
Wow, the explosion from her Big O was monumental. It was an intense, long, loud, shaking one. Yoni’s sphincter convulsed so strongly that I was hard pressed to keep the identical stroke going without being forcefully expelled. Trust me, she doesn’t like her orgasm interrupted with premature withdrawal.
And the aftershock was mind-blowing, too. We had been making love in the Scissors Position, her on her back and me on my side with my legs under her spread-open ones. When she put her legs together as the contractions subsided, it triggered another climax. Now when we stay connected and relax after an orgasm, it’s natural for the expanding sexual energy to spur one or two mini-orgasmic spasms. But this massive one was off the charts.
It’s an extra special good time when she gets two for the price of one.
But I believe there’s a more important moral to the story. I’m not savvy enough to figure out what to give her each time for maximum satisfaction. It changes so much I just can’t predict what will happen next time. What I do instead is follow her energy. I test, listen, experiment, watch and do more of what makes her crazy.
Well, gotta go. We have another wild time planned.
May you have as much fun as we do.